Loving our aging parents

Christmas is a time to be with the ones we love. For many of us, including myself, this is a time to take care of aging parents and take on a more active role in the holiday festivities. My parents have been happily married for 50 years and have been a wonderful example of marriage to me and my sister. They provided protection, shelter, security and love to us growing up. My mom made sure the house looked beautiful every year for Christmas. She even bought herself presents and wrapped them from Santa because my dad just wasn't that into buying presents. She LOVES Christmas. She's a giver, a people person, an outgoing, open-your-home-to-everyone kind of mom at Christmas time.

That's why it is bittersweet when we have Christmases like we did yesterday.

My family and I went to spend the night at my parents' home for the holiday and we have brought my mom back to our home for a visit for a few days. Things just aren't the same as when I was a kid. I really miss those days.

When visiting yesterday, almost as soon as I step foot in their home, I had to get dinner started and check on everything she was charged with doing. See, she and I had to go over everything in advance, several times, and I made it very clear with her what she was to do because it was too overwhelming for her to prepare all of this. She can't remember things and she doesn't have the energy to stand for long.

I even ended up buying one of my child's presents and having my mom give it to her as her own. Symbolically, I knew that I was beginning to take on more of the parent role with my mom in that moment, as she is not able to get out and buy presents like she used to.

It bothers her, I know it does, that she can't get around and do the things she used to do. She has the mind enough to know there's a big difference and it saddens her. It saddens me to know that those Christmases with her at the helm providing a wonderful experience for everyone, is now gone.

Yet in spite of her age, in spite of her inability to do the things she used to love to do, I love her for all that she has done. See, even though she can't do those things and I get impatient with having to do more things for her, I'm reminded of all the sacrifices she made on my behalf so that I could have a great childhood and pleasant Christmas memories.

So when I wake up tomorrow to having to hold my mother's hand as we slowly make our way out the door, down to the car, and over to Wal-mart to do some post-Christmas shopping, I will make every effort to make sure that SHE has pleasant memories from Christmas 2017 and that SHE is taken care of, protected, and cared for. That's what we do for the ones we love.