Living Together and Making Commitment

Commitment is the backbone of success. If you do not have commitment, your success will not be as great as you might like it to be. Commitment is a kind of mental attitude that is necessary for success, just like belief is. Here are some ways that you can develop your commitment to success.

Commitment is a commitment to a specific purpose, cause, or concept, and an effort to become involved. Those who are committed to a cause or a project really believe that it's important, and so they show up, follow through, and support it. The more committed to your cause, the better the momentum you'll generate to have the work done. And by working together, both committed individuals can maximize their efforts in bringing about success for each other.

It's easy to start committing when a friend asks you to do something extra for them. For example, maybe your friend recently had some terrible health problems, but now they've recovered. Maybe you met a great guy, but now you want to spend more time with him. All these are commitment statements, telling yourself what you're committed to and doing or wanting to do.

To really commit, there needs to be a clear statement of intent - what are you committing to, who do you want to do it for, when are you going to do it? For many people, committing is something that happens naturally, out of nowhere. For others, committing is something that comes after much deliberation. One person may feel strongly that he wants to marry one person, but not necessarily other people. Two people may be so committed that they share vows of commitment.

The difference between a casual, careless commitment and sustaining commitment is the frequency of the behavior. A casual commitment is often forgotten about quickly, while a sustained one continues to be re-affirmed. While there are many people who are perfectly content with life, some are not. If one is single and committed, being able to say "I am committed" is very empowering.

As you meet with each other and discuss your desires, don't talk about the vows you're going to make. The focus should be on living together as a married couple and having children. This will show how committed you both are to one another. If you don't have children yet, mention this to reassure the other person that you don't expect to get married and then wait for that time.

When you are talking about commitment, if there is to be any discussion of divorce, it should be handled by a neutral party. The other person (your husband or wife) might feel very threatened by the idea of being asked to stay married. For the sake of everyone, try to keep the conversation as calm as possible. If a division of assets is mentioned, don't mention how it will affect the kids and how you are working through that now. You are living together so there is no need to blow up a big deal over something that can be resolved.

Living together is always exciting but it can become stressful at times. Remember that you have committed yourself to living together and maintaining that commitment should remain the same. If you are still wondering what a commitment actually means to you, try thinking about it from the other person's point of view and you will understand what it means.

A true commitment is making lifelong promises to one another that will last the rest of your lives. There are various types of commitments. There is a marriage, civil union, dating, pre-engagement, dating within a long term relationship, sharing the life with your partner, sharing the life with your children, and even a lifetime commitment. No matter what type of commitment you are choosing, it should be something that you have chosen and not forced on anyone.

Giving and receiving flowers, gifts, love, sex, a home cooked meal, companionship, sex, and devotion are all forms of true commitment. The more you give to someone who is really committed to you, the more you will receive in return. There is no relationship that has no commitment. Whether you are dating someone or you are choosing to live together, the idea of commitment is present.


One way to maintain a strong sense of commitment, whether you are dating or you are married, is to have a certain amount of excitement in your relationship. There needs to be some fire in the pit; excitement is one way to create excitement. If you are dating someone, you may want to experiment with some new things, new places, and new things in order to keep the excitement level high. Remember, two people create a bond based upon the things they can share with one another. If you have real commitment issues and you feel like you are falling into old habits, talk to your partner about it and determine how they feel about it; and if they do feel that there is too much pressure being placed on them, maybe it is time to move on.