AN INTROSPECTION ON TIME, LOVE AND DEATH

The broken man stared at the empty road, his chin on his hands. His eyes fluttered in the fading sunlight, then he turned to the side and spat. He cleared his throat and spat again then he sighed.

"Time, where is your gift? These wrinkles, these crowfeet nesting besides the bags my eyes carry? These chipped nails peeling away at the chapped skin that cover my crumbling flesh? What have you given to me?"

"Is it my memories? What are memories, if not ghosts? A ghost does not breathe, does not speak, does not die, right? But it haunts, it whispers into my ears at night when I am alone, counting each square of the ceiling. It embraces me with its cold limbs and offers no succor to my present pain."

"Is it my experiences? What use are my experiences if I have nowhere to share them? What use are the things that I have learnt, If I have no voice to speak? What use is my knowledge, if I am dead to life?"

"Time you have given me nothing but pain and tears. My memories are full of the time I have wasted and the sadness of what I should have done. My body is broken with the weight of my years and as my eyes dim, I see my children, the only beauty and light in my life, fall into the darkness. I see them stumble, fail and fall; I see them seek for succor within the promises of tomorrow but I know better. I know tomorrow is a fickle thing and her promises are vague hints at possibilities."

"My experiences cannot help them as they do not see value in my words or listen to my wisdom. I am an old man; an antique model rusting in this bedroom, waiting to be chopped into bits to feed the ever burning fires of hell."

---

"Love; oh... how I hate you. How I detest the sighs the spill from your lips as you sell your lies to the naïve and lonely. You came to me with promises; you showed me a world filled with sunshine and beautiful flowers. There was a bleached beach filled with washed pebbles, cowries and conch shells, the sea was there too, gently bobbing her head to greet the shore and my feet with every tender tide. There was laughter and song and warmth and then you took it all away."

"Why would you give me a taste if you knew it was never going to be mine for always. She is gone, fool! She is gone and I didn’t have the time to say goodbye. She is gone and i am empty, bereft of a heart, cleansed of beauty, shrouded in the darkness of my pain."

"You told me you were perfect but perfection does not leave so much pain and anguish; perfection does not leave me tossing and turning like a ship in a stormy sea, deep into the early hours of dawn. You lied love, you lied."

"You should have let me be. I was better of alone when I had nothing to moan or mourn. Now all I do is wipe old tears. Those that I have given my love and my heart to are gone, my children do not know my name and everyone has forgotten her grave. The only thing I cherished is an abandoned tombstone and you speak of love to me. Speak no more!"

---

"Death! Haa! I laugh at you, you old doddering fool. What are you waiting for? You have taken all that I have every loved, so what are you waiting for before you take me? Take me! Is that not your only skill; taking. Do you know anything about giving if it is not pain?"

"You strut like a god but you are nothing. You are a lazy thing, who only comes to steal at the time of joy. You cannot even stay to watch your work complete. You are nothing; a bag of air. I spit on you!"

"You took her from me and left me empty and broken. You thought I was done but I surprised you didn’t i? I struggled forward and now that I seek to go on my own terms, you cannot deliver? You are fake, nothing, a word with no meaning, nothing."

---

A broken guitar strummed and a voice cracked with tobacco smoke and yellowed pain muttered a song;

Oh where is the sun?
Where is the light promised me
When my feet still gripped the soil
In sure purpose?
Where is the throbbing warmth of the humus
That led my dancing feet
Into the grooves and rivers of my soul,
As I searched for truth and joy?
Where is the redemption promised me?
Where is the clarity and understanding?
I ask you sir?

I am tired.
Let me rest here for a bit,
Put my feet up for a second.
So I can catch my breath.
I just want to sleep for a while,
Don’t worry I will be here when you come;
I just want to sleep.

---

The old man sighed as he watched a snake slowly swallow a rat. He looked at the broken man and shook his head.

"Time, love and death; three abstract that bind man to his daily activities. Seeking to be loved, searching for more time and praying to never die. We buy everything, do everything and share everything, just to get these three but do we truly get them?"

"Do you get enough time to be who you want to be? To do all the things you want to do? To achieve your dreams no matter how small it is? We rush around, preparing to live the kind of life we want, even as time spirals like dust through the wind, never to return again. We spend so much time preparing that we have forgotten how to live and by the time we realize what we have missed, it is too late; the time far spent."

"What are you doing with your time? It is a currency that diminishes as you spend it. It does not return back to what it was once it is spent? Are you using it wisely? Is there something that you need to do now that you are procrastinating on? There is no time, my friend. Tomorrow is always too late."

"Instead of muttering about time that has faded to dust, grab today by the horns and make it bend to your demands. Do all you can, boy and leave the fates their grisly work."

---

"What about love? What happened to you, to the boy who stared at everything with joy and a feeling of kinship in your heart? What happened to the little girl who gave her heart to the world freely, not knowing that the world loves to break fragile things? You feel nothing within you? Your chest is a gaping bleeding hole and no man’s words can bring healing to you, can it?"

"What happened to the friends and family who promised to love you forever? What happened to the beauty you saw in the world? Oh love has failed you, has he not? He gave you a taste and then withdrew his power from you. All you taste now is ashes and dust?"

"But there are those who seek your smile, who need to hear your voice, to know that you are fine, out there. The sun is still shining and the moon still tussles with the sea. There is life and so there is love; it has always been so. That she is gone does not mean that you can’t see her in the eyes of your children, in the laughter of their children and in the words that still haunt the air about you. Love never ends and until you step away from this void into the light, it will be your light in the darkness and when the shadows grow voices and fingers to torment your insomnia.
Your children have not forgotten; they are simply battling their own demons and in time, they will find their way to you; you will see."

---

"Death will come for all, you just have to wait your turn. It comes too soon and too late but it comes. At the end of the day, it is not how you died that matters but how you lived. Folks will remember your life, not your death. When they speak of your death, they will be speaking of how you lived. If not for death, what will be the meaning of life? What is joy without the pain to make it sweet and give it that tang that makes you weep while you laugh?"

"Death, love and time; three abstracts that makes living make sense. Managing these three will decide how much you will gift to the world by the time all is done."

The two men sigh and stare at the world as it falls asleep.

THE END

I am not feeling too good today, mentally. I think I am going to make only this post today. I will see you tomorrow. Stay safe, stay strong and stay STEEMING.

Image Source: pixabay

---

Hey folks, this is Oskilo's blog and he would love to read your suggestions on how to make this blog better serve you. He would like to know what you, his reader, think of the content so do not forget to leave a comment; you just might have something he needs.

Peace

©@warpedpoetic.

art and flair courtesy of @PegasusPhysics