Socially programmed and insensitive: #@?% that!

Late last night I wrote a post about some of my evolving ideas about developing Steem community and in it, I swore and made a note of mentioning it. I swear a lot.

The interesting thing is that swearing is a sign of intelligence (I am not claiming it is in me however) and those that do it score higher on IQ tests than those who don't _source, as do those who can recall the most swear words in a minute. _source

I do not know the reasoning for the intelligence factor but going on my ability to swear so much, I think I have what it takes to attempt an answer:

My assumption is that those who feel free enough to swear are likely to be more intelligent because they are not as constrained by social convention. This pushes them outside of the mean making them not average. This however doesn't necessarily translate to more intelligence however, as there are two sides to the normal distribution. But, if one factors in the ability to recall swear words in a minute, this will tend to be on the 'right' end of the scale.

On top of this, those who swear are likely more open to new ideas and variation as they are likely to be less judgmental based on said social convention and more sensitive to their own thoughts on subjects. This would indicate an intelligence. Combine this with likely less care for social acceptance, and it is likely that they have been more open to various experiences and more willing to explore questions that others find uncomfortable to approach. Of course, they could just be angry bastards too who are just too f#cking dumb to know any better.

One thing that I have found through experiential observation is that when it comes to conversations I enjoy having, it is generally with those who are able to swear in a conversation are those I find the most trustworthy. I assume this is because they speak their mind, not what they think is socially acceptable to be said. This tends to translate into greater integrity and completion of tasks.

I wrote an article some 8 months ago quoted below about swearing and my baby daughter. Have read if you haven't but the general gist of it is that, I don't care if she swears as long as she understands that her actions have repercussions and consequences and she will have to take responsibility for her words.

I swear, by the moon and the #@?%!

 

When I was young, maybe seven or so I got smacked by my mother for swearing. I was watching TV with my brothers and said 'pricks' as she walked into the room and was swiftly scolded, no questions asked. If a question was asked, she would have realised that my brothers and I were watching the Formula One and I was reading the Grand Prix text on screen.

Yeah mum, excuse my French.

Lately, I have talked to a few people about children swearing and I have no problem with it. If my daughter wants to swear, she can go right ahead but, she will have to learn to swear like me. I swear a lot and I can have a very crude mouth. It has something to do with me finding humor in any situation and there is nothing really sacred and beyond talking about.

However, there is a time and a place to swear. Most people have been raised with an aversion to hearing people curse even though they themselves may do it a lot. It tends to bring out the judgmental parent in people, the one that lives on in the programming of the child.

This means that if most people's first meeting with someone is filled with expletives, they are likely to judge the person harshly. So we censor ourselves for social acceptance and opportunity. Most of us do this naturally in the same way most of us change our vocabulary when speaking to children. It is a social awareness and to be unaware of this means one is missing a certain amount of social intelligence.

This means that there are consequences to not understanding social norms of other people even if one doesn't care of the norms for themselves. But once a relationship has formed, the stronger it gets, the more swearing may enter into the field. It could even be seen as a sign of trust between friends.

Going into an interview for a management position with people unknown is likely to not play out positively if the language used is curse-laden. But, not long after getting the job and getting to know the people personally, swearing may become a commonplace occurrence.

For my daughter, I don't want her swearing for the sake of swearing but that goes for any parts of her language ability. I am hoping that she will be aware enough of her surrounding that she will be able to adapt and use a vocabulary of best fit.

When she is with me however, I want her to feel free to be able to say whatever she thinks is appropriate in the moment. Yes, she is likely to make slips and say the wrong thing at the wrong time like we all have, but blindly punishing her without context is quite ludicrous. I am not going to limit her and expect her to live to my own ideals. What I will do however is help her to understand the ramifications of action.

Words are actions as they create movements in the mind and like any action, there are reactions, consequences. This means that there is a responsibility of action that gets carried with the words we use. People talk about free speech but rarely about the right to free reaction. This doesn't mean violence but it may definitely mean a 'No' in an interview.

In my opinion, there are much worse things than swearing in this world and unlike a lot of negative habits, swearing itself is not some gateway into the dark side of the force because if it was, I would likely be Darth Vader by now. So, I don't mind if she learns to swear as long as she understands the repercussions of her actions.

But that goes for f*cking everything and some people are just Prix

Another part of the study _source found some other interesting signs of intelligence that indicate to me not only a lower need for social acceptance but, a higher acceptance of themselves at a physical level also, they are more comfortable in their own skin.

Those with higher intellects were found to be more likely to curse, eat spicy breakfasts, and walk around the house naked.

I drink strong coffee for breakfast but, thank f*ck my wife swears too.

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]