POETRY | DAY 8 | Altered Pathways
Altered Pathways, poetry by @naquoya.
Day 8 of 100 for @d-pend's Poetry Challenge
Altered Pathways
A lightness
So magical
As it twists within its cocoon of delight
That is layered
Within me
This carved out spectacle
As it tip toes
Its altered disturbance
Within
Misfired
Syncopated
Brainwaves that carry me forth
That carry me
Into the depths
A disturbed remembrance
Of forgotten existence
And each time
A layer
Renews
Pitch perfect
Sung sweetly
To the tune that emerges
From the echoes of my mind
Snap-frozen time
A single release
And a token to share
For the thoughts that have frozen
Or chosen to remain
Behind
Reading Notes: This poetry is new and written exclusively for the 100 Day Poetry Challenge, which is explained in more detail here and here.
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Images sourced from unsplash.com.
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@naquoya
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Potpourri | My Steemit Poetry Collection
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Thank you for the support.
Thank you for sharing @naquoya. I like the balance of words in this poem. I get confused if I have to write sentences or commas and periods or whatever. Then I remember a poem can be a line of words with a punch.
From my eyes these words are the meat:
The rest of the poem is the set up that gets us ready to hear your song. As I look through your blog I see you are in a similar state as me. Writing a poem a day after work doesn't give me much energy do write much else.
Peace,
@mineopoly
Thanks for your constant support. As for punctuation in poetry, I have to confess, I have no idea how to do it, so it's rarely there.
And yes, writing one a day is difficult. Leaves little time to interact as i would like. Maybe on the weekend I can catch up.
Likewise :)
I like this style. It's sweet how you used a word to firm a line.
I need a token. Hahaha
Thank you, glad you like it. The single word on some lines felt like it altered the dynamics as I read it to myself. Chopped the rhythm up enough for where I wanted to take this poem.
It's a challenge, so different styles of pietry will surely surface, rhyme or no rhyme
I know what you mean. I'm trying to mix it up also. I used to write a lot of rhyming poetry, but have been learning to take a different approach lately. Will also dabble in rhyme along the way I'm sure.
different approach than most of what I read of yours - cool to see how this challenge has challenged all of us to mindfully approach our approaches to writing with new avenues to explore to help us find techniques we haven't or have hardly utilized before.
Always great when it leads to something fresh and fun to read as this piece here - thank you for sharing, @naquoya.
I hope to mix it up a little bit, but it can be difficult to snap out of the style and the rhythm I normally think in. Trying to be conscious of the need to explore a bit, to read more and experiment a bit.
Thanks for dropping by and sharing your feedback.
nice! I myself find this style of writing to be very expressive, and have used it several times. :3
It's an interesting style to use, kind of choppy, with a more edgy rhythm. Thanks for the comment.
Nice job writing this very interesting poem. Great images too. I will look into this challenge.
Thank you. If poetry is your thing, then certainly have a look. It's a long journey ahead!
Into the depths of a disturbed remembrance - those lines particularly struck a chord with me.
Thanks for letting me know, I appreciate it.
This was really beautiful; your word choice, rhythmic yet choppy flow, and overall imagery left an impression on me. I kept seeing the life rings of a tree 'slice' in my mind's eye as I was reading.
Thanks for sharing!
That's an interesting visual to perceive from reading this. I love it, happy to hear how this impacted you. Tree rings signify periods of growth, or ages in a a cycle, if I'm not mistaken, so that certainly fits. Thanks for your comment.
You are most welcome...and no, you're not mistaken :)
Enjoyed this, especially these lines which added a technical, almost sci-fi feel to the piece:
Misfired
Syncopated
Brainwaves that carry me forth
An almost sci-fi feel works for me, especially in this piece. Glad you enjoyed it.
I especially like the opening three lines.
You've got to hook them early. Thanks for letting me know.