Psychological Projection // Part 3 // Projection Clarifications

Not Everything is Projection

Sometimes we make judgements based on the facts. Sometimes people clearly hurt others with their actions and words.
For example, I can reasonably make the statement that “X has done horrible things because he stole from people.
I’m not projecting that, I am making a reasonable judgement based on X’s actions.

Ok, so that is an extreme and easy example to understand.

Let’s look at another example where “Z” has said cruel things to other people, has been emotionally abusive, and has manipulated others.
Again, if it is a clear fact recognized by multiple people that these things have occurred then it is not projection in stating so, it is just stating reality.

Self-fulfilling Prophecies

Sometimes projections can lead to self fulfilling prophecies.
In the case of my Ex who I shall refer to as “X”, as our relationship developed he revealed his past to me.
In his past relationships he had cheated on others and had done some shady things to people that ended up hurting them and screwing them over.
He projected his fear of me doing those things to him.
His biggest fear was that I would leave him so he tried to exhibit controlling behavior to keep me in place.
In the end, the abusive aspects of his projection are what drove me away and his biggest fear was realized by his own doing.

Reacting to Negative Behavior with Projection

Now here’s another example to consider:
Let’s say someone appears to be exhibiting manipulative behavior.
While the manipulative behavior by this person may exist, your reaction to it may also be a form of projection.
Meaning, if you have had a negative experience with being manipulated in the past you may have a fear of being manipulated again and have a very strong negative reaction to this person.
Or if you have manipulated others in the past you may hate that about yourself and project that hatred on to this person.
This form of projection may cause you to have a stronger reaction against this person than other people may have.
It may prevent you from being able to forgive and from seeing any good in this person that they may be willing to change.

The Light and the Dark Within all of Us

I recently wrote a blog about The Light and the Dark Within all of Us
We all have light and dark within us.
Yes, in extreme cases of someone murdering or raping then more dark is present, but I’m steering clear of those examples for now and just talking about the majority of people.
If someone exhibits behavior that is undesirable sometimes we label them as “bad” but I think it is important to remember that people can and do change.
I don’t like to look at people as entirely one thing - all bad or all good.
I will say that someone’s behavior may have been bad, but I don’t like to label them as “bad”

Check out my previous posts in my Projection Series

Part 1 of my Projection series went into detail about what projection actually is.
Part 2 offered examples of Projection

Part 4 of my Projection Series will discuss ways to stop Projecting.

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@isaria

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