Finding Feliz

I couldn't find some time to post here on Steemit as I had been very busy last month. I want to go back to my usual writing routine but there are just too many distractions around, aside from my own mental noise. It's high season now and I've been taking people on tours, which means making a living. It has also been a very stressful month for me. And the whole time I was going out there and dealing with people, I've had some profound realizations. I realize how much I don't really need everyone else. I gave a chance to new friendships and just ended up getting hurt. I guess that's just the risk of opening myself up to the world. That's just life as we know it. At the end of the day, it's just me and my cat. I still need someone to tell being alone is fine. I found comfort and peace in my loneliness.

Feliz has been missing for 4 days now. I feel devasted. For the whole 2 years of trying to make sense out of my life, he has always been there for me. I think none of these things would have been possible if he was not beside me. It turned out pet's a better company. Losing Feliz is my biggest fear.

Just the other day he fought a snake that suddenly got inside my apartment. I was scared and Feliz, in his hunter mode, killed the snake in no time. I wouldn't know what to do if he was not there beside me. He made me feel safe.

He's well-fed and loved. When I was out on a business trip, I asked someone I trust to feed him regularly. I know Feliz doesn't like me going away for a long time. He's quite a needy cat. But everything I do is for his own good too.

The only thing that made my life a little less painful is Feliz. I remember when I came back to this country, I knew I needed a company to make life here bearable. He's more like my emotional support.

Happiness is when you found something that you really like, like really like. That's Feliz for me. The only thing that can sit with me, sleep with me, eat with me, and live with me. Because I hate most of what's outside my dome of safety. I'm excited to come home because I know that there's one thing that's always happy to see me. He's always needing my affection. I've never felt so needed and appreciated in my life.

I'm quite heartbroken right now. It would be hard to lose him just like that. I don't know where he is right now but I hope that he's safe somewhere. I won't stop looking and waiting for him.