Dear Diary: I Wish I Could Make My Family Go In A Vacation

When I was still able to walk I am bringing my parents to eat in a restaurant even in fast food restaurant like McDonald's and I feel good when I do because with that I could show them some appreciation about what they are doing for me.

All of that came to a halt when my body no longer allowed me to be mobile especially when my appearance had changed from a beautiful, beautiful butterfly into a grotesque Quasimodo-like creature which even in my nightmares didn't occur.

So I am just frustrated that I could not do anything now and going into a mini-vacation plans and dreams even went out to the window and probably will never come back and get a possibility to happen.

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I Wanted To Go In This Place And Experience The Climate And Food There

If I am just able I would like to go with my parents eat at least twice a month in a restaurant nearby or go to our relatives for a few days and spend some lost days with them even for only short time.

So I just envy people going places and vacations and then making their activities known to their social medias and letting me see it. It just breaks my heart even realizing that I could not do the same so I am just obviously sad about it and frustrated down to the bones pun intended.

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Eating In A Nice Restaurant With My Family Is Just In My Dreams Now

I can just count in my one hand how many times I ate in a fancy restaurant. My father didn't take us to any one or attempted to do so in the past so I am just wanting not to do that that is why I do not want to do all his "mistakes" to this family.

But it seems that due to circumstances beyond my control some or most of my plans and longings will not happen. Now I am just thinking ways to circumvent my disabilities so that I could show my parents and the rest of my family how much I value them because fo what they are doing for me even in such simple (but I want it grand) way.