All Aboard The Neymar Hype Train - The Most Overrated Player In The History Of Football

We are two weeks into the greatest football show on Earth, the Fifa World Cup and it has delivered on its promise to be a festival of fun.

There have been a couple of firsts for this World Cup, for instance it is the first time that Italy will not complete their 12 year jinx. For those of you that don't know, every dozen years since 1970 Italy have made the World Cup finals, and as long as they don't face Brazil, they won it!

However this year Italy did not even qualify for the tournament being held in Russia, so no finals for them. Another first is seeing Germany being knocked out at the group stage, something that simply never happens.

Gary Lineker an English broadcaster and ex-footballing legend once uttered the famous words; Football's a funny old game, 22 men chase a ball around for 90 minutes, and then the Germans win on penalties. This was in reference to the fact that no German player had (at that time) missed a penalty in 20 years; the record went till 2014 when Mesut Ozil missed one (they still won the shoot out).

So if you're a football fan this World Cup has been a good one, as we've had surprises and the usual suspects are perhaps not performing quite as expected.

All Aboard The Hype Train!

There has been one thing that has been fully expected though, and that is the amount of hype and hot air surrounding whom I can only describe as the most overrated football player in the history of the game; Brazilian centre-forward, Neymar.

Before him this title would have gone to Zlatan Ibrahimovic, however Neymar makes the Zlat man look like Diego Maradona.

I never rated Ibra and couldn't work out what all the fuss was surrounding the player, however I can't deny he did score some good goals, and had some great moments, namely the four goals he scored against England in a friendly back in 2012.

However Mr Neymar is absolutely rubbish, OK, maybe I'm being a bit harsh, let's just say he is distinctly average. Which is why I can't work out why all of the commentators at the World Cup keep going on about him and quoting him as one of the best players in the world.

HE'S NOT!!

Well if by one of the best, you mean one of the best 500, then sure, he probably sits around 350th, however he is pure hype and I have proof. So before you rush to the comment section to tell me how great he is, jump on board the hype train and let's take a look at the statistics surrounding this over hyped enigma.

But What About All His Goals Cryptogee?!?!

Yeah, OK, he has scored 56 goals for Brazil and he's only 26; wow! I must be wrong; right?

Nope.

Let's analyse those goals shall we?

38 of them, yes 38 have been in international friendlies . . .

So what? I hear you say, goals are goals, and he has scored them.

Sure, but have a look at these goals, all but 3 of them, have been scored against whom Brazil would consider inferior opposition. Teams like China, Bolivia and Japan (of six and four years ago) are hardly teams to trouble the likes of Brazil.

Plus you can add four goals to that 38 goal friendly tally, for the Confederations Cup, which is essentially an International Friendly Competition, which requires no qualification and single game knockouts.

So 42 friendly goals, leaving 14 competitive ones and only 3 of those against quality opposition, Argentina and two against Croatia.

Compare this with Gareth Bale's 26 out of 29 competitive goals, against opposition just as good if not better than Wales . . .

But He Played For Barcelona Cryptogee, He Can't Be Rubbish!

Yeah, and they sold him, and before you say it was because of the astronomical fee that they just couldn't turn down. They have another player who would have fetched at least twice what Neymar did, Lionel Messi, so if it's all about money why didn't they sell him?

Because Messi is good, that's why!

He's The Most Expensive Player In History!!

Yup, and Paris St Germain who paid circa €222 million for him are owned by people with more money than sense, and trust me, if they have not already regretted that decision, they will very shortly, when they find that nobody will even pay half that to take him and his astronomical wages off their hands.

In what is surely the weakest 'big' league in Europe, he has managed 19 goals in 20 games, compare this to Messi and Ronaldo who regularly get over 50 goals per season, with Messi once getting 73 goals and 27 assists in a single season.

Those are the kinds of returns you expect from a player who cost almost a quarter of a billion euros.

Last Word - His Hair

Listen, great players tend to have pretty ordinary hairstyles; why? Because they don't need to use their hair to draw attention to themselves, they do that with their dazzling play.

Neymar however, has a pretty stupid haircut, I wouldn't be surprised if it's in his contract that he can be the only one with such ridiculously conferred hair, so that you can spot him when you're seated with the Gods.

So that's it, Neymar is hugely overrated, and for some reason, the fans and much more annoyingly the commentators seem to go along with it.

The Why

I think it's because he played for Pele's team Santos, he has one name just like the great Brazilian who won the World Cup on three separate occasions and starred in a virtuoso performance when he was just 17.

Neymar was also (apparently) a really good youth player, and scored a few goals in the 2012 Olympics (though football and the Olympics . . . hmmm, let's just leave it at that.)

Plus I think Brazil just want another Pele, they need someone they can worship, their arch rivals Argentina have Messi, so they want a star, and in the absence of one they've gone for Neymar.

OK, well I like to keep my rants to a thousand words or less, so I'll stop there, and let you tell me why I'm wrong (I'm not of course, but I'm willing to hear from you).

SO IS NEYMAR THE MOST OVERRATED PLAYER IN HISTORY OR JUST THE LAST 100 YEARS? AS EVER, LET ME KNOW BELOW!

List of international goals scored by Neymar

Neymar Page - Ligue1

Cryptogee