Time to heal… Taking Away a Child’s Medication – Child Abuse? #familyprotection

in #familyprotection7 years ago (edited)

Well, it is my 1 year Steemit Birthday this month! It has been quite the rollercoaster ride both emotionally and spiritually!

You would think that on my 1 year anniversary, I would be blogging like crazy, but I have actually taken this month off due to focusing on some personal healing and family issues.

You may or may not know, my son has additional needs. We have been trying to work with doctors for years now and this last year has been trial and error with medication to help him to focus at school, calm his tics and reduce his anger and violent outbursts.

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Unfortunately, the medications did not help; in fact they made things worse. After months of trying, we have decided to take him off the medication all together. He is much happier and calmer and although he cannot produce the work that school requires of him due to his concentration being all over the place, he is more content in his emotional well-being and socially he is able to function in a much friendlier way.

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Now we have the dilemma that the doctors and schools are involving outside sources. He has an assessment today with an educational psychologist. We are not allowed to be there for the first hour, they will be assessing him in his classroom. We have been ‘invited’ to a compulsory meeting to discuss their findings later in the day.

My worry is that although we are his parents, the government has been known to prosecute parents for child abuse for refusing to medicate their own children, even if they feel that the medication is doing more harm than good. #familyprotection has many articles on similar stories and it is frightening just how much power the government has over our son. They can take my child away and put him into care just because we don’t want to give him drugs… in our son’s case, the ADHD medication is the same as Speed!

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After the assessment today, I don’t know what will happen. We have another meeting with the paediatrician to discuss our decision, so I guess it will be a case of having to convince them that this is the best thing for our son. I just hope it doesn’t all go wrong.

I guess I will be writing to you either from the comfort of my home, or from a jail cell! Lol Jokes aside though, this is a serious possibility and I pray that I don’t find myself in that situation. Please hold us in your thoughts today and send positive vibes.

Thank you for reading, much love, @beautifulbullies xx

(Thanks to unsplash.com for the free images)

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Dear @beautifulbullies, I know this is something to worry about. State agencies are known for this kind of behaviour. I am dealing with a similar issue. My daughter has a light form of epilepsy and never needed medication. The neurologist in Holland didn't find it necessary but now all of a sudden they keep mentioning it here in Ireland as: Daughter has still not received medication for her epilepsy. She doesn't have the kind where she would have uncontrollable fits. Her 'version' gives nightmare like scenes in which she speaks, responds, and she used to scream and cry about something that seemed like something she had a dream about. Almost like sleepwalking and talking...It scares me that other people think they know better. As for ADHD medication, it's horrible stuff. My friend's son was on it and he needed sleep medication at night because the ADHD meds kept him from sleeping! I believe she quit giving it to him too. I sometimes feel that schools insist on the meds to make it easier on them. It has nothing to do with the welfare of the child. However stressful your situation can be, I hope you can manage to remain calm and not let them get to you. YOU know your child best, no one else! I will send some positive energy your way. Stay strong! Much love from Ireland.

I hope your situation is resolved easily too! It is so hard when you realise that someone else has more power over your child than you do :( But we will fight for them. Stay strong! xx

Oh my gosh, @beautifulbullies :( My heart goes out to you and your family. It is like walking through a field mine nowadays being a parent and the most vulnerable are being targeted for whatever reason.

In my childrens' school (a Montessori School), the Director had the state come in and evaluate the whole student body....kids from pre-school through middle school and over half of those kids were diagnosed with ADD/ADHD/Autism. Luckily my two children had a bug that day and were home with me but I was shocked when they returned and I heard this. Not only were the parents not informed or told their child would be evaluated but 60% of the school? I listened as the conversation turned from curriculum to 'medication' other mom's were giving their child with horror and I witnessed several of the children complaining to their parents how they didn't want to take the medicine because it didn't make them feel good. Then on one occasion I was on a field trip with my younger son's class (pre-school) sitting with the other parents and one of them brought up the recent 'evaluation event' - this parent's son was my son's friend and a really smart and wonderful kid - and they told me that their son was diagnosed with autism. What?! This didn't make sense to me and I was very concerned about their son - given that other parents followed what they were told about their childrens' newly diagnosed state. But then they told me that they were both 'pediatric doctors' and they did not think this was true and in fact, just recently invited over their other doctor friends that were developmental pediatricians to discuss and evaluate what they were being told and all disagreed strongly and all were very concerned as well that a school would be subjected to this.

I could go on about this with other frightening stories we've experienced as parents but I'm sure you've been through it all yourself. Especially if you do have a child that has added needs - it is a nightmare...a scary one.

My sister-in-law has a child with defiant disorder and she homeschools now which I think is the smartest thing you can do if you live in a state that allows this (I hate even saying that - allow). This is what I would do, @beautifulbullies if you can at all wing it. You know better as a parent what your child's needs are. And if you can, find a doctor (like a functional medical doctor) that will support you and your son - go to bat for you, be in your corner and use other non-medication methods to help your son through this (although they are regular medical doctors however trained in addressing the source).

I would also get as many doctors (that are aligned with you) on your team as well as some large parent groups (that share your experience) that will make a lot of noise.

See if this is helpful to you (regarding the facts and your parental rights): https://www.cchrint.org/issues/childmentaldisorders/

And here is an example of functional medicine's approach to ADHD: http://drhyman.com/blog/2015/10/21/7-strategies-adhd/

Good luck to you. Sending hugs and prayers.

Wow! that is so scary! I don't know who is behind all these diagnosis' or why, but it is awful that so many children are being labelled without the proper requirements being met. Who exactly is driving this trend? Is it the Big Pharma companies or is it the schools? who knows! But we are losing control as parents that is for sure. Thank you for your reply xx

Hi @beautifulbullies .. I can totally understand your pain!

I'm an ADHD adult .. something I never knew till like a couple of years back when I was having a casual chat with a friend who runs a school for such kids.

First thing I'll say is screw the system!

Sorry for this outbrst (I'm ADHD remerber?) but really medication is so NOT the way to go. It's at best a band-aid to curb the symptoms and and effects .. and shoving pills down a childs throat is a vicious violation of human rights. Hope you could keep up the fight for what is best for your kid.

The road ahead will be a tough one .. I've messed up quite a lot of stuff in the my military days .. .. even messed up more in the Uni .. nonetheless I've successfully gone gotten a B.Eng degree .. but work-wise there are the challenges itself. Not just from the lack of focus .. but also at times from the hyper focus state when I'll just dive so deep into 1 item and neglect the rest on the list .. and amongst many others ..

Though tough .. it's never dire .. ADHDs have their way of working round things .. friends call me a cockroach that can't be killed!!

Guess one important thing now is to try to channel his energy into things that he likes and hopefully excel in. Many famous adults confessed to being ADHD themselves :)

Find ways to get him into useful things that can turn his hyper-focus state on more often .. There's also an online magazine which focuses on ADD (pretty similar) .. https://www.additudemag.com .. found some facebook support groups too .. things I never had back then.

Wishing you all the best for the meeting. .. and even more better days for your kid and your family :)

Take care

Thank you so much for your words of support! It is great to hear from adults who have been through this themselves who agree meds aren't always the answer! My son is the same way as you describe. He can so intently focus or obsess over one thing that he completely forgets the rest of the world around him! And then other times he is like a whirlwind and I can't keep up with his brain or train of thought lol He is such a funny boy he has an amazing sense of humor and absolutely loves animals (which is good as we have 5 dogs lol) They tend to calm him down, or if that doesn't work, we go out dog walking and he climbs trees to burn off his energy! This is so much better than drugging him imo. Thank you for the link to the magazine, I will defo be checking that out! much love, beautifulbullies! xx

Ya .. think those pharma and the govt must be in some conspiracy!! Haha

Oh .. yes .. the humour part .. I've the class clown ever since adolescences!!

Oh .. by the way .. if u are on Andriod u may wanna download this app "Photo Guru" .. it's photgraphic communitty app .. currently they are running a topic called "Silhouette" .. the 1st photo of your boy's silhouette looks awesome .. can give it a shot :)

@beautifulbullies My brother and sister, both adults now, have been medicated since children. My sister in particular started at 4 years old and is now 25. She has effectively been taking amphetamines every day for 20 years. She has very little emotional skin and finds coping in regular situations difficult; it's like she never developed the mechanisms to cope with the real world. I support your decision 100% and I'm sorry that you feel scared. Just know that the real abuse is the damage done to children's' brains and bodies through the consistent over-medication of personalities. Hold tight, it'll be ok x

Thank you @permieemmy :) He is 13 and wasn't on them for more than a few months so hopefully no permanent damage has been caused. It is so hard as you want to trust the doctor to make the right choices, but in the end our children are our responsibility and we have to fight for what is right for them xx

This post was upvoted and resteemed by @thethreehugs. Thank you for your support of @familyprotection.

thank you so much for your support! :) xx

You are so welcome my friend.

I am really sorry to hear that after making such a courageous decision for your son that you are being questioned by those who have no idea about what is going on in your life. I hope that this goes okay for you, you are doing what is best for your son and that is the most important thing. It should be you and your husband's decision and no one else's.
I will be thinking of you all xxxx

Thank you @trucklife-family. You have been so supportive and have given me the courage to write about these issues. If we stay quiet, the powers that be win without resistance. I truly feel like I am not alone in my fight here :) xxxx

Dear @beautifulbullies, my heart goes out to you and your family. I so hope and pray for compassion from those who could cause harm. May they only see the improvement in your precious child. We also stopped the harmful medication my difficult autistic son was on. He is still a handful but much better. The drugs were really doing such damage. But we are in SA and they aren't as rigid as, I think, where you are. Be STRONG!

thank you so much @buckaroo! xx

He is your son, they can see you have tried everything to help him, sometimes medication worked, it did for us and sometimes it doesn't, every child is different. They will put together a better teaching plan, possibly a mentor or more one to one. Your doing great :)

Thank you @karenb54 I know you know first hand how hard it is to fight for your child when they have these issues to face on a daily basis. I wish the school would step up, but they seem to want him medicated so he hits their numbers on paper, rather than what is best for his mental health. Luckily the meeting went well today and I think the psychologist is on our side, but we won't know until we receive the final report. xx

We got through it and survived i am sure you will do the same. Be strong and fight for your child its all we can do :) xx

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