It's Your Fault, Own It!
Everything you have in your life now is a result of a choice you made. Whether good or bad, whether you’re happy with your life or not, you are the reason you are where you are. If you were to die now, and you could say you did the things and had the things you wanted, for your family, for your own enjoyment, for whatever, then keep doing what you’re doing, this article isn’t for you. If you are not where you want to be in life, read on, this is for you.
Have you ever thought about the fact that you chose to be where you are? You might think, if I were to choose my outcome, it would sure look different than it does! Not true! You chose to be where you are just a surely as you got up this morning. But, but I grew up in a single parent home! Yes, and? Other people had the same background and made something of themselves for which they are proud. If you’re thinking of reasons it’s not your fault that you are not where you want to be right now, you are lying to yourself.
Ok, I know this sounds harsh, so let me show you. You are confronted with choices all day every day. Some choices don’t seem like they will make any kind of difference, like what to have for breakfast, but in the big picture they actually do. If you choose to eat cake every day for breakfast, you could at some point become overweight. If you choose to eat a healthy breakfast every day, then you will also have better health than if you ate cake. These choices generally take time and repeatedly choosing the same thing before you see the effects of your choices.
Some people do have advantages while others disadvantages, but it’s what they choose to do that ultimately matters. If you choose to not get out of bed in the morning until you are late for work every day, you could lose your job. If you choose to get up early and get to work early every, you could get a raise or a promotion. The choice, and resulting outcome, is yours.
Say you have a good job, and every day you go home and watch tv then go to bed. Your performance at work is good, you work hard and think you deserve to rest. Your co-worker has been around as long as you and you both make the same amount, and are good workers. Your co-worker goes home and works on a side hustle, say a blog or a YouTube channel, and is developing a steady income. One day you both go to work to find the doors are locked and the business you worked for has gone under.
You’re both upset and frightened as to the future, but your co-worker goes home and steps up their side hustle and begins looking for a job. You go home and begin looking for a job. A month later neither one of you have found a job yet. You are wondering about paying rent, and your co-worker is wondering if he actually needs a job, his side hustle is meeting his needs. Was your co-worker lucky and you were not? Or are you both reaping the rewards of your choices?
Every choice you make may not make a difference all by itself. Many times it takes time and repitition of your choices for their results to show up. You don’t gain 30 lbs by eating ice cream once. You don’t get into debt by buying a new pair of shoes once. It’s the habits that develop from individual choices that will get you, good or bad.
So if your life doesn’t look like you want it to, look in the mirror. You are the only one who can change it. Make friends with that person in the mirror and agree to do what it takes to get where you want to go. If you want something different, you have to do something different to get it. You can’t keep heading west to California and expect to end up in New York. Find someone who has what you want, and do what they do.
Give yourself permission to do or not do what is necessary to reach your goal. The only one holding you back is you. Understand just like it took time to gain 30 lbs, it will take time to lose 30 lbs and keep your expectations in check. It will help you not to get discouraged. Make changes slowly. If you try to change too much too fast you will quit. Keep choosing to stick with your plan and you will succeed.
Much success to you and all the best on your journey! You deserve it.
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