Sweet Surrender - My #100words Entry

in #100words6 years ago (edited)


Here is my submission to the #100words contest hosted by @thewritersblock. Thank you for this opportunity. It was challenging to work within the constraints of 100 words.

 

The crisp linens and acrid hospital smell assaulted her senses as she slowly opened her eyes to the golden afternoon rays falling upon her ashen face. Was this the day the fighting would stop? Would she surrender to the pain and persistence of her cancer? If not for the suffering in her mother’s eyes she would have given over the peace death offered.

Her chest was heavy with effort, fighting for each wheezing breath as the monitors rose and fell in time with the symphony of her surrender. With a faint smile upon her lips, she released and drifted home.

 

 

Image Source Pixabay


Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://papacrusher.vornix.blog/2018/08/28/sweet-surrender-my-100words-entry/

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All That Is Gold Does Not Glitter,
Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost
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That's powerful. Made me feel something. Well done, sir.

Thank you, I appreciate the compliment.

Powerful was my first thought as well.

Thanks, buddy!

Beautifully written @papacrusher!

My pleasure.

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Ahh heart touching lines @papacrusher each word precisely fitting the image and that within 100 words...ypu got some poetic touch too👌

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Thanks for the compliment.

This is beautiful and sweet, @papacrusher. Certainly, it is not a happy story. But we all must go at some point, and for this character to be aware that it was her time, and almost to choose it, is really somewhat uplifting. You did a really nice job of helping us to imagine that experience and that moment.

Thank you so much for the feedback and support, it is greatly appreciated.

@papacrusher, may I suggest one edit? There is an extraneous period in the middle of the first paragraph, after "... cancer?"

@jayna thank you so much for the catch. It is corrected now. I detest grammatical and punctuation mistakes!

Great! Glad I mentioned it, then! :-)

I'd say you did quite well in 100 words!

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Thank you for saying so!

good lines friend..
i like it..

You are welcome dear friend...

This is a very difficult writing. I know. Great job!

Although I'm in the competition this is one of my favorites, I loved it. Congratulations.

Thank you so much for the compliment!

howdy sir papacrusher! what a beautifully written piece. It's amazing that you can have so much of a story in just 100 words! Have you been writing your whole life or something?

Thank you so much for the compliment. I've been writing on and off since around high school age.

ahah! I knew it! lol. it really shows which is wonderful. I'm sure people tell you all the time that you don't fit the image of an officer of the law right?
lol. you HAVE to surprise alot of people with your friendliness.

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