Are you under 30? Let me explain the 90's to you.

in win95dotexe •  last year  (edited)

I'm so, so, so sorry.
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We didn't know the internet would be this much of a cunt.

Honestly, email was just like, this thing nerds used. We could play this text based game and email like, one guy.

Then we played Doom with the sound plugged into a guitar amp so the shotgun sounded awesome.

Then we went outside and played on bicycles, and that was like... it.

Then myspace happened, then facebook and youtube.... Then we bought like... one thing on the internet and we were like... "look mom, holy shit it turned up!"

Then the nerds started getting laid and buying ferraris, but they were still ugly, so we didn't get jealous or anything; but they were bangin' supermodels, and so nerds started getting symmetrical features.

That's how you got Instagram and vine. People who actually wanted to show their face started programming.
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And now we're here. I'm so sorry. People in their 30's and late 20's own all the best websites, and people in their 50s-60s own all the best property.

We're so, very doomed.

Subscribe to Jordan Peterson's Podcast and have a diversified portfolio of peer to peer lending and cryptocurrency; that's all I know. I'm too old now, and so very tired.
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The parts i got were hilarious