My neighbor

I decided to watch my neighbor all the time. Dog poop on the lawn means that I need to teach him a lesson. The first time I noticed the dog poop smeared on my drive way, I didn't know how to react.

Dan was my neighbor, he had two dogs; Jay and Mark. Dan was a nice human or so I thought. The first day he moved next door he came bearing cookies. He had a good sense of humour and He was cute too. Until I got to know him better. Dan was selfish, lazy and narcissistic. He was an inconsiderate little sonofabtch*. I am allergic to dog furs, which I told him the first day we had a coversation. But dan was too busy to care.

A day I slipped at my door step, glad I had no injury but I ended up at the Doctor's. Alas! His dogs were at my side earlier . My alergies were so bad I was at the hospital for a week.

We had a huge fight when I did get back and we haven't talked since then. Until last week when I saw a dog poop smeared on my path way, I was agitated but I didn't react, I let it go. Now my f*cking lawn!!!!

I was furious, I stormed in and started pacing. I wanted him to feel the same way I was feeling and I started thinking on how to teach him a lesson... After minutes, I got nothing..

I sat on the couch, pondering on my revenge. Then I got interrupted by the sound of my mobile phone. I had a message..

Congratulations for ranking in top 20. Your reward is two days worth of free internet.

It was my network provider. They do giveaways at the end of the week. The top 20 with most internet activities in an area. I have been wining since it started. Well, half of my life is spent on the internet, I was freelancing for different business, websites, social media manager and more.

I dropped the phone still furious, suddenly it came to me. I put on a more decent wear. It was saturday and I knew where exactly to go.

I was back in 15minutes. I tiptoed to his doorstep and poured the content in my paper bag there.

I went to my door to wait. He's going to be out soon. I finally got tired of waiting and went in door. I was about taking my cereal when I heard his voice

what the fuck!!! He kept screaming and cursing.

I went outside to look at him, Yea!

I laughed so much, the expression on his face was priceless.

He had stepped on the cow dungs I poured at his doorstep!

You did this? He shouted

That's what you get from not keeping your dogs on leash I replied.

He kept cursing as I walked back in side my house.

Finally, it was silent. He must have screamed out his gut. I took my bath and decided to take a nap. I woke up with a loud buzzing sound. It was so loud I couldn't figure out what it was at first. I steped out of my bedroom and the sound got clearer. It was a trumpet. The trumpet was so loud It felt Like it was being blown inside my house. On getting to the door , I saw Dan blowing a trumpet right in fron't of my door.

Ooh God bless me to unleash hell today!

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We both ended up being detained at the police station, I guess the neighbors called them. Thanks to I and Dan cursing and screaming in the neighborhood.

I don't know how this freewrite ended up about two petty people. I enjoyed writing it though😁
Picture source: pixabay

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