Unfollowing You Wasn't Personal

in unfollow •  25 days ago

I recently unfollowed a bunch of accounts -- again.

Unfollowing you specifically, wasn't personal.

It wasn't for anyone I unfollowed.

I'm pairing down and backing off. Someone visited the last post I made and commented about the unfollowing.

He said maybe we'll see each other on another battlefield.

I'm not looking to be on a platform that's a battlefield.

Do you think anyone would join the platform if it was advertised as such? Well, maybe I shouldn't word it that way. There's lots of gamers who would because many of their video games are battles -- but I don't even play video games.

I wanted to enjoy myself here and I'm just genuinely not enjoying myself here despite:

  • my efforts (changing my mindset and approaches)
  • attempted work-arounds (using different Steem lookup and search tools that others have built), and
  • joining (and subsequently being overwhelmed and stressed out with Discord after a couple of months-- and then unjoining that).

It's just not resonating with me -- maybe it will feel better in the future.

I need a respite from the things I experience IRL on a regular basis.

I was hoping this platform would allow that or give me that or something. Maybe I don't even know anymore what I expected. But when I come here, I just feel angst, competition, control, uphill (for lack of better verbiage) -- battles, and manipulation -- just based in how the platform is structured in and of itself.

It forces people to be those things in order to "succeed." I see it. I deal with that in the corporate world and have dealt with it in the past on social medias. I don't want that where there is supposed to be community.

And I thought Steemit was supposed to be the community -- not Discord. Doesn't anybody even hear the irony in the name "Discord"? It's the opposite of harmony.

Unfollowing you wasn't personal.

Before I'm all powered down, I'll probably unfollow the rest too. And not because I don't enjoy the content, but because I want to tie everything up before I leave, if I end up leaving. And if I don't and change my mind in the future, then I can kind of start with a clean slate in terms of finding content again. I don't know what I will want for content in the future and this will leave it open.

In his comment he mentioned the price of Steem.

I don't really care about the price of Steem. I never have. I just thought it was gravy -- like a little bit you get to go to the movies or buy junkfood like when you did when you were a kid. You know, like after your mom let you canvas the neighborhood to collect aluminum cans you took to the store to recycle, and got 5 cents a piece for. Mad money.

I never came here to make a full-time living.

Those of us that deal with family court on a regular basis -- can't, unless they can specifically fight with the courts, their lawyers, the opposing parties lawyers and a judge who just isn't in the mood do all the damn math --and convince them that you're account really isn't worth whatever your ex claimed it was on the last round of papers that were filed ---- and afford it --- oh and maybe succeed.

No thank you. That drama is not cost effective for me. So it was never about the Steem.

Unfollowing wasn't meant to offend. I'm just doing what I need to do to for myself.

And people are allowed to do that.

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I hope wherever it is you find yourself that you attain that inwhich you're seeking. I won't take it personal when you unfollow me, after reading this. Truthfully, I admire what you're doing, being true to yourself.

I do my best to ignore the crap I dislike. I look around for voices that cry out from the wilderness for justice, and that's why I followed you. When the crap gets too deep, or rustles my jimmies, I take it on.

Since all it can cost me is Steem, which I don't use for anything but upvoting folks, I have zero fear. However, I have very little interest in drama, so don't do it much.

While I wish you had found a community of folks that enabled you to find respite from RL woes, I can understand how the crap can get in the way of it. Thanks for being here while you are, and I hope to keep some connection to you even if you leave.

I followed you because I admired what you had to say, and I'd hear more of it if I could.

Thanks!

Steemit as a battlefield? O.o
No. NO.
Steemit as the brotherhood of abundance and social connections.