Joseph Mary & Three Wise Travellers.Updated.

Stephen Hawking’s writings are not always heavy reading I’ve discovered.

When I got his book ‘Brief Answers to the Big Questions’ as a birthday present recently, I groaned inwardly on unwrapping it.I thought back to the struggle I had with ‘A Brief History of Time’ and not ever beginning to understand the concept of black holes in space.

The book marker is still in page 3.

The eight big questions by the way, are listed in my earlier post - https://steemit.com/life/@ijavee/hey-92-yesterday

Most answers and predictions on those are much easier reading although space ships of the future being powered by light beams is difficult for me to comprehend.

A contrast by example is his simple reasoning and verdict about the possibility of Time Travel.

As an experiment he decided to hold a party for time travellers. To make sure only genuine time travellers turned up, he advertised the party date after the event.

No one turned up! Conclusion? Time Travel is not possible.

Like thousands of others I like reading Professor Stanley Unwin’s unique mangling of the english language which somehow can still be understood and the result often extremely funny.

I posted his ‘Mary & Joseph’ on here last year. I like reading it again at this time of year. I hope others will too.

Professor Unwin's Worms of Wisdy.

Bloggage from the grale beyonders, sprinkly wise worms all tricklyhow in the eardrobes of the human specie.

Once upolly-tito, in a land far awale, a young matrimole travellit for the count’n’census all checkly-box present’n’correckers there.

Joseph trickly-how along the roam with Mary all two-square on the botty astrile a donkey, seekit accomodakers.

Weary weary all eye-rubbit and achey in the legbole, theyr turned the corm and spied a taverl all glittery in the dark there.

Jospeh rattatat on the doorclabber, and out stepped the innkeep, who doffly cap and questit “Pintly bitter and a dry-white?”

“Oh no” said Joseph. “All knackerit from the travelode, and despery need of a bed for falollop’n’snoozit there”

“Folly” said the innkeep. “All the accomodakers fully occupile, but if you trickly-how to the stablode, feel free to prostrale among the animolds in the straw there.”

So off they trickly-how round the sigold, nudgit the cows and sheeplodes out the way, and pretty soon theye were out like a light.

Now Mary was in the familode way, and dury the nightlopper she brought forth a new-borl infold all squawk’n’screamit like fingerdrobes down a blackboard there.

Early the next mordy, arrivit severold shepherds.

“Goodly morlode! We bring giftloppers for the ankley-biteloder, but we are simple agricold labourits, so don’t expect Nintendole or X-bokker. Just a bottley gold-top and a wedgeley cheeseopper.”

“Deep joy” said Mary. “Joseph. Putly kettle-on for a cuffalo tea-dee. These chaploders deservit a tilty-elbow. Oh yes.”

Just then, throo wisely men strollit through the door and bow’n’scrapeit before the infant there.

“All hail the Holymost child! We have falollowed a starloder all glimmerit in the skybole, and now pay hommy to the king!”

“Folly folly” said Joseph. “King? He is the humbold offrspriggit of a carpentale from Nazareth.”

“Oh no” said the wisely men. “He is born to be kingly, as scribelode in the divine textbookers, and son of God.”

Then arrivit a celestibold host of Angelodes, all warbly in the throakus and twangit on the harp there. “Hosanna and deep deep joy!” they sang.

“Deep joy indeel!” exclaimit Joseph and Mary. “It’s all kicking off here!”

So there, at the very first Chrimbole, they all sat down to roast turkey with all the trimmage, and watchit the Queenly Speechlode before noddly-off with a dry sherry.

Oh yes.

Seasolly Greetage to everybole from @professorunwin and his earthly scrile!

image credit - www.comedycard.co.uk