Yeah this gave me a good creepy vibe before the sun sets hahahaha It also doesn't help that I'm staying in a place where all I can see is "The Deep" above me.
But good on you for putting together a nicely written story. You did a very nice job on it. I like that the father was tough but in someway forgiving with his children. He did what he had to for his family but wasn't always nice about it. You captured, very well, that helplessness feeling a child can have in situations where they have no control. I think this is what was the creepiest part for me because we've all been children and we all know what that feels like.
Thanks for sharing! I thoroughly enjoyed your story. Cheers!
Thank you for the great feedback. Yes, I was definitely going for the isolation that a kid feels when they realize that their parents are truly separate people with their own lives and histories. There is a sort of existential horror that comes with it, something we all feel in ways less supernatural. Not that I'm any kind of expert, but I think one of the keys to horror is tapping into common experiences and turning it up to 11.
hahah YES! Turn it up to 11. Great reference.
That's what did it for me! I've felt that as a kid. I kind of feel like we all have. As a kid you're just dropped into someone else's world and there's always some situation that eventually clues you into that. That was my favorite part. And I really liked how you just took it to that next level. There was compassion from the father but the kid was pretty terrified. I almost see the question come across his mind asking whether or not this guy is his father or how could he be?
Fun stuff to play with and I loved the way you did it. Thanks again for sharing. Cheers!