I am not the type of woman you fall in love with

I dedicate this poem to all broken women, who fear to love again, who just have sex because that's the only time they feel loved, to women who crave love but build a fence against because they never want to get hurt.

I'm not the type of woman you fall in love with,
We pull clothes, scratch bodies and all,
And when we are done I don't get to say anything about it,
You don't say anything about it either.

As a man you love this with so much passion,
To get it all with no commitment and I let you,
Sometimes I lead you on like I'm attached,
That makes the game fun for me too.

I act like I got emotions and fallen so hard,
I even start to get jealous at your female friends,
This starts to boast your manly ego,
You start to think you've conquered me.

But then I start to pull back from you,
I trick your mind and you think I'm upset,
I just pull back to put on my emotional condom,
The rules that set me back from falling.

You slowly fall in love with my mysteriousness,
You start to think you can accommodate me,
You imagine being the one to change me,
And worst of all, you start to love me.

I play along because I don't want you hurt,
I don't want to be tagged the playgirl or flirt,
But deep down I know I'll never fall,
Because love is one thing I don't seek to feel.

Soon you go out of town and I don't bother calling,
This is the only way I can let you go,
Without hurting you much or carrying the guilt,
And it works as I fade out of your mind.

And I sit here searching for another prey,
As I pretend to have a cold unlovable heart,
Many times I know I lie to myself on this,
Because as humans all we really want is love.

But I'm a girl who have tasted love and got burnt,
I just choose to stay far away from it's flames,
After all, I have heard them all say,
"The best way not to get your heart broken is to pretend you have none.

But as I sit with my glass of whiskey and red lipstick,
I hope to be loved beyond mediocrity someday,
Because the love I carry is more than this generation can give
And I hope my broken pieces will be enough for me to be loved with.