[Poem] looking for a purpose

English version

I've tried so many times,
I’ve tried to write what I feel, to put all on sheets,
Sometimes I feel like I’m getting creeps,
When I look at everything that was left behind,
I feel slowly as time passes,
and the bell does not sound,
I do not understand what's going on anymore,
everything that's around me seems to let me cold …

Who am I? And what am I doing here?
it's too foggy,
I have too many fears,
Some become giants, while other remain small,
I'm somewhere in the middle, I'm trying to find my purpose,
Trying to find my way, and not become the fool.

And that's how I’ve become
To put my soul on papers,
To share them with the world,
To make two from one.
And that's how I’ve become,
to be a little crazy,
Because in this world,
Ordinary is only the devil.

Romanian version

Am incercat de atatea ori,
am incercat sa scriu ce simt, sa pun totu-n foi,
Uneori simt cum ma cuprind fiori,
Cand ma uit la tot ce-a fost in urma,
simt incet cum timpul trece,
si clopotul nu suna,
Nu mai inteleg ce se petrece,
tot ce e-n jurul meu parca ma lasa rece…

Cine sunt eu? si ce caut aici?
e-n jur prea multa ceata,
ma prind prea multe frici,
Unii devin giganti, altii raman pitici,
Eu undeva la mijloc, incerc sa-mi gasesc rostu,
Sa gasesc drumul meu, sa nu raman ca prostu.

Si de-asta am ajuns,
Sa-mi pun sufletul pe foi,
Sa le impart la lume,
Sa fac din unul, doi.
Si de-asta am ajuns,
sa fiu putin cu capul,
Fiindcă pe lumea asta,
Normal mai e doar dracul.

Image source:Pixabay

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Story of the verse

Last night I was trying to sleep. I couldn't go to sleep and a little rhyme arrived in my head. I grabbed the phone and started to note it down, but more and more ideas were coming. I opened the laptop that I just close and started to write and write until the poem was done. And then I went to sleep.
I wrote it directly in Romanian. This is the first poem that I wrote in my native language in over a year ( I think). I don't remember exactly when I wrote directly in Romanian last time. This is why I've place the initial version as well.