Why I still believe

I have to admit that my desire to belong to an untainted religion is so strong.However, because of recent developments, I begun questioning my choices in my life. Why have I stayed in it despite the countless intrigues lately and why do I still believe.

No religion can solve my problems or guarantee that my life would be great for the rest of my days. It is part of our world that sometimes, things do not go as planned. No one is in complete control of any situation no matter how hard we try to plan or anticipate circumstances.

The truth is that, it does not really matter what religion you belong into or how many donations or fundraising activities you had done.It does not also matter if you spend the rest of your days doing nothing but praying and praising god or even preaching.

I believe that the best way a person or any religion speaks is through its heart. If there is nothing in it but the unswerving desire to be the best, righteous or dominate others even in favor of something good, then it does not count at all.

For me, believing comes from the heart and no amount of coercion, directly or indirectly, bribing or any form of "controlling others" in order to have faith is simply wrong. That in itself makes me believe in mine.

A few months ago, I was also very furious with one of the religious group for the things that some of its members perpetrated. It took me quite awhile to process things but, my honesty with one of their members caught me off guard when she said this to me: " I ask forgiveness for all the things they had done but you have to understand, it was not I but them who did it."

How easy it is for us to associate everyone for past mistakes or deeds and, it was quite a humbling experience really.

I am still an active member of my group and, I am expecting that I would be for a very long time. Yes. I belong in a group where a lot of controversies arise but that does not deter me at all. In fact, it had made me realize that this is the real deal because it recognizes its faults, it repairs, it heals. Most of all, I believe because no one coerced or forced me to.