Let Kids be Kids

in parenting •  2 months ago 

Children are expected of so much these days.

So many aren't even allowed to just be kids anymore, let alone express their true unique selves.

So for my children,
I will "let" them play,
I will "let" them discover themselves,
I will "let" them express themselves,
I will "let" them figure out what they like and don't like,
I will "let" them learn in their own pace,
I will honour and value them for their unique characters, likes and quirks.
I will "let" them be themselves.

But let's be honest, it's not really up to me to "let" them do anything. They are my responsibility, not my property. They need guidance, not coercion.

A parent's true job, other than basic survival needs, is really just to love and guide these little beings, so they can learn to understand themselves, to love themselves, to know their true worth and to realize their true potential.

Can you imagine a world full of children like that?

Wouldn't that be amazing?

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  ·  2 months ago (edited)

Is that a real Banksy piece?
They’re certainly powerful words, but as you know they’re part of the philosophy us unschoolers have been following for years - I bet that statement hits some parents like a ton of bricks!

Letting kids be themselves and make their own decisions is seen as a stressful thing to most...but letting go of that ‘control’ what you find are happier more contented humans.

Love this post.
A world full of kids who can realise their true potential is one I want to live in!

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It's definitely a Banksy quote at least!

I hope that the statement does hit parents who need it most! It's time to break the destructive cycle of authoritarian parenting. It's bred enough wounded people, who don't know themselves and love themselves enough, or even at all. And look how it's affected the world!

On the other hand, whether or not it's because of a "your vibe attracts your tribe" thing, I'm seeing so many more conscious parents and empowered children around me. So to be very honest, I have a ton of hope for our future!

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I will do anything for my kid to be happy and so if letting them to be themselve will make them happy, i will do it

It would be amazing, but the sad truth is most parents were children once, too, and they weren't "let" to do any of those things, so figures they don't now with their own kids. Well, I guess it doesn't figure, because change depends on us and you can't really blame your parents and all, yet many do.

You see it in some parents, who on the one hand complain about their poor little babies who have to break their backs over hours of dull, pointless homework, and yet, when you suggest alternatives or maybe to cut them some slack, they immediately tell you how they too suffered hours of homework. Like it's retribution or something.

I saw something earlier today, said your kids aren't your art and it's selfish to think so. Kids are their own artists, creating their own lives and you, as parent, get to watch them do it. But it's not your canvas, it's theirs.

Really liked this post, Red :)

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As you said change depends on us. We all have to take responsibility of our own actions, however our upbringing. I was not parented the way I parent now. It has taken a ton of deconditioning and healing to get to this point in my journey of parenthood. I realized that it was down to me to break the cycle, and it was very empowering to know that I can!

I love the last bit about kids being their own artists. It is so true, and it's time parents start being way more conscious about what they project onto their children, because of their own fears, insecurities and negative experiences. It's not easy, but it's possible and very freeing once the conscious effort is made. And the truth is, (parenting) life is a lot more relaxing, fulfilling and full of joy, on the other side of "control".

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I think a lot of parents want their kids to be the kid they never was, hence all the piano, art, ballet and god knows what lessons and activity

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Indeed they do. But you said it in your statement yourself, "To be the kid they never were". And there is such a massive difference between giving your children the best opportunities and expecting them to fulfill the dreams you wish you had, but never did. Of course, the latter can become quite an unhealthy situation, as I'm sure you can appreciate.

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Absolutely , trying to get your kid to become the kid you never were is not necessarily the best for your kid. It's just moulding them into what you want them to be and not what they want to be. Sadly, it still happens quite a bit amongst my friends

I think always need to motivate the child in right direction and let them do what they want to be .
Forcing a child to follow a things which parent's want to do thats not right .

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I would agree :) but in the end, I also like to believe that most, if not all parents, are always doing their best and doing what's best for their children, based on their values and beliefs at the time.

I just hope that every parent will have more conscious awareness of how their way of parenting is truly affecting their children, and always be willing to learn, adapt and evolve.

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