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RE: [PARENTING] To Spank or Not To Spank? My childhood experience, what I learned and how I incorporated that into parenthood
Hello @merej99 !
I am not a parent and I will not claim to be one!
Your post is a very good one but let me tell you this:
- Your/our kids are like sponges that need to learn
- They need to know right from wrong
- They need support and they need to interact.
Somethimes like you wrote is perfect : I've actually had to take his computer apart and he earned the parts back one at a time... with good behavior.
You can never know what your child will become....I mean I saw so many cases of child abuse and molestation and the child..who had become an adult he turned into a monster, criminal...or just committed suicide.
We as parents or future parents can teach our children how to act...
Like.. From their first years they mimic a parent and start to act like us in many casess .
Some people don't see this and they think it is a good thing.
Well, depends on your point of view... A child mimics a parent ...he mimics the good but olso the bad...the more bad the more he will mimic until this it will become his personality as a adult human being.
Again I canot say that is good or that is bag to spank a child ...All I can say is that we are directly responsible of our child development.
You are so right about how we mimic. I was assessed with Asperger's as an adult. The only way I could really learn how to assimilate with my surroundings was mimicking until it felt natural. I've had many college friends who finally got out of their parents' oppressive thumb and got wild and destructive? WHY? I can't speak for them, but my impression is that they never had the freedom to screw up and figure out, or be taught in a safe environment, that sometimes mistakes hurt.
I also have many peers who were terribly abused and they turned to drugs, alcohol and promiscuous behavior. They did everything they could to get away from their parents and ended up marrying the same type of person. Cycles
As @eric-the-red mentioned, breaking the cycle is hard - but we have to be objective enough in our life experiences to take the good, reject the bad, and forge a path.
Thank you for your thoughtful comment, @cynetyc