School-Shootings: NRA demands closing of schools
After another mass shooting in a US school, the worried citizen NRA (National Rifle Association) has demanded a closing of all schools in the country.
It cannot be that so many innocent children are killed again and again. Schools are dangerous. We must put an end to those horrendous incidents. We must tackle the evil at its root.
The NRA spokesperson admits that closing all schools at once may be problematic.
Of course we must be careful and should not overreact. Some schools still need to exist, but only under heavy regulation. For example every student should be mandated to openly carry a gun. Weekly training on the school grounds would make sure that the students can aim. That would prevent most, if not all, death from school shootings.
As always some unpatriotic, un-american socialists from the education lobby have sprung up to tell us that this is bullshit.
They say that it is not the schools that are the reasons for gun death, but the wrong usage of those. With more education, shooters would be deterred from killing students, because they would know how schools work.
Asked for a statement, president Trump said:
We will make America great again! We will make it, you know, I have said that a lot of times, I have said it just last week to that great Korean guy, we will... what was it? Ah yes, we will make it the greatest shooting range in the world, better than anything that, that, what was his name... that Obama guy could ever make! Everyone who says otherwise is #fakenews
Is this a joke? I hated school so much as a kid. I walked in happy and full of life, and walked out miserable and depressed because I never had much time for friends. Still, I learned how to operate with the knowledge I was expected by society to know. Though, it would not be until many years later that I could learn about the things I wanted to be an expert in, by spending my own time and resources to learn those skills.
This is not a joke. I wish it would just be a joke.
It is a satire about the usual:
There was a shooting!
Restrict guns!
You cannot do that! Only guns prevent gun deaths!
Switch schools with guns and NRA with education lobby and you have the typical statements.
Attacks in educational institutions occur in other countries, but they are not mass in nature, unlike in the United States. For example, in September 2006 in Canada, a young man impressed by the massacre at the Columbine American school in 1999 (12 people were killed and dozens injured) came to Dawson College in Montreal armed with a self-loading carbine. As a result of shooting killed one and wounded 19 students. In January 2017, a teenager opened fire on his classmates at a private school in the Mexican city of Monterrey. Wounded a teacher and three children. In March 2009, in Winnenden, Germany, a teenager using his father's pistol staged a bloody massacre in his former school, and then on the streets of Winnenden and Wendlingen, during which 15 people were killed and 11 were injured. In March 1996, the British Dunblane man, accused of pedophilia, shot 16 children and one adult at a local elementary school. Another 16 people were injured. This was one of the bloodiest dramas in British history. In all these cases, the attackers committed suicide.
I also hated school. My parents made me believe that the school system is everything that once you finish it then you will live a happy successful life, but look at me now. I found happiness in just being myself not by being forced to be something else.
Please tell me the NRA did not actually say that?
What? About the schools? No.
The same about guns? That guns don't kill and only more guns protect you from shootings? That is their favorite sentence.
I guess any of it being true is facepalm material enough.
https://www.msnbc.com/all-in/watch/paul-ryan-no-knee-jerk-reactions-on-guns-ever-1162885187935
He could just record it once and playback every school shooting.
I don't think I have nearly enough :facepalms: for that info.
An actual solution I heard about this in the past from the NRA was to give teachers guns; these people have utterly lost their minds, they have become habituated to being surrounded by lethal apparatus and are so de-sensitised to it they see it as a normal, civilised way of life.
Yeah... and wasn't it in one of those gun teacher schools where students where killed half a year later?
I nearly laughed then.
omg this is insane!