the fall is nearby Mahiha

So what if a girl says she’s different, in reality when you see in a clear light no girl is different when it comes to love, they all go through same emotions when it comes to love. Let’s go back to 2001 when my parents got divorced and I left with my mum to my Nona’s place I had no idea what was happening around me I used to see my mum cry but I didn’t know what was going on, I was too small to remember my father’s presence in my life so Nona’s place was in a crowded colony but it was peaceful they had a garden where I used to spend all my time after coming back from school, I started school soon after I moved to their place with mum. My mum was a working woman, with a good paying job so money wasn’t really a problem, so one day I was sitting in a garden playing with my dog when suddenly a boy of my age came besides me, he had chocolate brown eyes and he started blabbering all about his clay toys. It was a start of something new to me, those chocolate brown eyes and the Lil boy became my bestfriend in coming years.

Like all other stories time passed in this story as well. We became friends, family friends our families used to plan trips together and we made good memories, everything was going good but like every other good thing this ended too. Our families had a huge fight and so we drifted due to their differences, we weren’t allowed to hang out together nd sadly we didn’t share same school, it was year 2005 and I was riding my bike(cycle) when someone knocked me down from behind and guess who that was, it was the same boy with chocolate brown eyes, I fell from my bike and he took off on his he didn’t even help me get up. That my last memory of him.

My mother remmaried in year 2006 and I was sent to hostel or you can call it a boarding school in the outskirts of town. because both my parents were in govt. services and they got frequently transferred they didn’t want their work effect my studies but the good thing was my boarding school was close to Nona’s place and I loved hoth my grandparents Alot so I visited them in weekends sometimes mom n dad used to come down at Nona’s in weekends so we spent time like a family. I wasn’t very attached to my new father but he was a good man so I remained decent with him.

Everything was okay, Hostel-Studies-Nona’s place-Weekends.

I never saw him, choclate eyed boy even when I visited in weekends I didn’t see him. I don’t know why but it must have been fate, living side by side still no see.

In Year 2008 I discovered that I was going to be a sister, Soon after I got a baby brother so I was giving my last exam and father came to take me to the hospital from school hostel to see my little brother, it was a pure bliss those tiny fingers, I got a sibling.

In order to give us a good life and to stay like a real family my parents decided to stay put in a peaceful city and I moved from hostel to a city and far away from Nona’s place as well. There I lost any chance to see him but god knew Facebook n Instagram was going to be a trend in coming years.

We were a happy family, I was transferred to a convent school, finally socialised and made a life long group of friends. It was La La Land for me.

In 2014 I made a Fb account and in a few days span I got a request from Fahad Siddiqui, Yes that was his name his real name. His name brought back memories in a sequence, Leaving-Coming to Nona’s Place- Dog-Fahad-Friendship-Rainy Nights-Terrace-Fights-Marriage-Hostel-Baby brother-Moving and then Fahad Again.

I didn’t accept his request because I was still pissed at our last memory so I got a text from him saying are you the same Girl I used to be friends with? ‘Aliza’?

I said yes! I asked him if he really remembered me and then he started telling me things even I didn’t remember doing together. He said I was his first bestfriend ever and you know the drill we started reminiscing past day n night. Our keypad never stopped typing. We were inseparable once again I always saw him like a friend and never felt any weird vibes between Us.

I should probably tell you now that I never had a father-daughter connection with my New Father. We never talked for more than few minutes it was just that way and it was okay so psychology says if a girl doesn’t have a good relation with their father it is not easy for them to get close to any guy or trust them.

I had a problem in trusting boys I always had. Fahad and I started speaking on calls n everything we were like long lost bestfriends and I also helped him in setting girls he liked at Nona’s place whenever I visited there. Our Family Rivalry was not much now so they were all decent to each other.

In 2016 I met Fahad for the very first time in person in a different city where I was visiting my cousin and he, his sisters. We planned to meet and greet each other in person and at close proximity. So there it was our very first meet, me being me and him staring at me with completely different emotions in his eyes, I could see him falling but I didn’t want that, I never wanted it. I didn’t want to trust him in that field. I wanted to stay friends with him but some things are inevitable and you can’t control them, he fell for me hard and I didn’t or I just kept repeating that to myself.

People have touched me when I was a little girl differently, I was little but the touch was gross even in that tender age I knew because there was no superman aka father to save me from villains .

I despised men and suddenly this guy made me despise them a bit less, this chocolate eyed boy broke the shell and drowned me in water. I could see myself falling but I didn’t want to god knew my misery!

He fell for me , I felt for him and he pampered me, he cared, protected me.

Mess! I was a mess and he decided to deal with this mess he knew what a dysfunctional person I was but he decided to be with me. Things were la la land once again but you know how they say behind a mask there’s a real face and so it always comes back to haunt you. Fahad loved me in my imperfections but he never tried to get what I was dealing with, he wanted a gf, he didn’t want Madiha or the past that had made me. I was quite strong, never let anyone in. I let him in thou and he is here still but the thing is the river is all dried up, the flowers are all wilted, the leaves are leaving the branches and the fall is just nearby.