A Post I Tried to Put Off but Our Family Needs Serious Help For my Father and His Health
My father, John on the right and my uncle Mickey on the left.
Major worries and concerns growing in our family
For awhile now I have been doing all I can to avoid posting about the current stresses ongoing with our little tight nit family unit. Mainly due to the fact I just am too humbled to seek for help outside of myself by working for what I make in life. This is a quality deeply instilled in me due to the man that raised me and his father before him. We come from a very working class Irish-American family, from County Cork, Ireland to be exact a couple generations ago, so its ingrained from birth that the only right way to make it in this world is through dedication and work. There comes a time though when obstacles are so heavy in front of you that you sometimes have to suck it up and admit to yourself the only way to resolve the issues maybe through the help of others, its taken me a few weeks and a lot of new friends here in Steemit to grasp that but many have begun telling me to write what I am about to share openly with you in this post. I do hope you guys read this one completely because this is a bit more of a personal situation in my life that is wreaking havoc within my family bad.
My father, great man and silent giver to all
My father's name is John Flaherty, a very hard working man his whole life and actually spent many years of his youth over in Vietnam fighting for this country. My dad though is not a very political man, he mainly went due to the draft and due to a passion within himself to help others and defend the strangers in America that he considered family in the late 60s and well into the early to mid 1970s.
From there my father was an electronics engineer, working even in a few top secret programs with sub contractors that were building systems that ultimately landed in with NASA's usages. We don't know much about this side to his work, he has kept faithful to the system that national security was involved so as far as we know that is between him and his company.
Hard times hit though in the late 80s for my father. Dedication to his work did not pay off like it does for so many small timers working in government contracts, so he was laid off and its been up and down financially ever since. He ended up moving us to Florida when I was 10 from his home state of Connecticut and from there the constant attempts to rebuild a life for our family, including my little sister Kelli has been an up and down rollercoaster as it is for many Americans due to the way this country runs.
The present issue going on
To speed you up without a long day to day story about 70 years of my fathers life, we had a horrible bit of info come back from my fathers doctor at the local Veteran's hospital 2 years ago that my father carries with him 2 aortic aneurysms located near his stomach. The chances of the slightest jerk or movement could rupture this so he has been under the care of doctors at the local VA but still to this day the important surgery keeps being put off.
We have theories on this in my family, my dad is the silent type so he seriously does not feed us all the info out of pride but we suspect the reason in the last 2 years he has not been into surgery could be due to insurance and lack there of for men in the VA system so they keep putting him off. While this is going on my dad had to take a forced retirement so to make matters worse he is now stuck providing income via Social Security checks which is sinking them even more in debt than ever before....good old America looking out for the guys they put in harms way as usual.
Today I got a jist of the situation in passing that my father is risking his life due to finances. He is too proud to fully say it but today their fridge just went on the fritz and through stressful worries I found out how seriously in debt they are and this is creating a perfect storm of him putting his health issues off. I am personally as well in a rebuild issue in life and my sister just got through a serious divorce so we are all stressing out in the family trying to figure out what to do so my dad can unburden himself of this needless putting off of such an important surgery to save his life.
Doctors have told my mom that he is a literal walking time bomb, and this was over a year ago so how he is still moving around in the pain I catch him in is beyond me. Definitely a humble tough guy never wanting anyone to put themselves out for you him but I think its time I try to take a little charge in the family on this and seek help.
I am going to try to put aside funds I earn from this here to help them, kind of surprise them with a sum as fast as I can to hopefully get him to afford the simplistic and most important thing a human deserves and that is a healthy life after so many years of service to his family and to his country. But I am not with a lot, this is part of the reason those with my Steemit Blogger Central project see me so determined to work 16 hour days, just so I can get ahead to help others and also to help my family out.
I hate to beg or ask for help but if you could maybe pass this around so we can use this post to at the very minimum raise enough to help my parents get a fridge would be sweet, can't expect the community to pay for everything but a boost towards them to not stress as we sort this issues with his needed surgery could go a long way. Stress is bad for aneurysms and right now that is worrying me and my mom here.
Thoughs that know me know this post was not easy for me to write up but I am feeling very up against the wall on this one, this man has put up with a lot of my shit as a wild kid, has always been there for me through anything I done in life and I really want to give him some quality to his life as swiftly as I can. The man is my hero, always has been even if he doesn't see that daily out of me, the suffering right now I see him deal with is just not fair.
This just further divides me from this US Government, you would think they would better take care of those under their Veteran's funded budgets but they don't. I been to that hospital with him numerous times and its a madhouse of inanities how many people sit there all day like they don't matter. I truly hope in crypto we form something better even in health care because the way its being done, its not right!
If you can please upvote, I am going to take what comes at this to put on a card for my parents to catch up their bills so he can focus on his health and stop being stubborn about it. I thank all of you that take the time to read this and those that help, at the very least send a few prayers to our family, its been an ongoing rough time and we could use the break.
All the best to you and your father.
Thank you so much for that and the support. I just followed you and it means a lot to us during this constantly stressful time. Wasn't easy sucking it up about this and posting but I figure we are family here and we do so much for each other that I figured its just time I let this out.
I'm following you, too. Keep up the good work.
Really appreciate that. If you notice my feed has been more related to the crypto and Steemit community, rare I post personal stuff but I figure its time, I been here long enough and everyone here is growing to be a second family to me and my fiance so I think its time now and then to get more personal with everyone. I am really honored to have you with me here, don't be a stranger
Of course, nothing wrong with sharing personal things here during hard times. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
Thank you....I am sure its something that will get easier for the family, just one of those moments where one stress hits after another. Really do appreciate the support, this is why I am full time in here helping with my projects to promote others work in Steemit, real genuine good people all working together is a very powerful thing
real story of girl in my society
To those who might find this offensive, please don't proceed.
And to those who think this is a ninja technique of getting attention, please kindly think of your favourite bad word, and think that I gave that to u 😂😂
So I am girl soon to be 20 and for me, football is life. From school days I used to play wrestling, football with boys and used to be a don 😂 Friends said I should have been born as a boy. Btw I am a straight girl 😂
So let's come to the point. I think thinking about is Ronaldo actually leaving real Madrid or it's just rumours is actually better than worrying about what to wear to please anyone. And worrying about can Gianluigi Buffon win CL in his last season is far more better than thinking about Falano wore that and looked better than dhiskano. And discussing about the transfers in this window is better than discussing about people and their personal life.
I know everyone has their own interest and their own point of view, but discussing about people on their back is never a good thing. I won't say every people out there who doesn't watch or play football or any other sports has the same habit or there can be a people who are interested in both sports and cheap strategies. But to those who have a spare time to think about others everytime, grow up people. I have not stated any gender here, so please, the feminist people will kindly be ignored.
And to those dear people (only for them Hai) who think that they should get a special treatment or respect just because of their shitty gender, work hard, fight for that and earn the respect yourself.
And last, if girls think that some happiness lacks in their life, some thing's still left even though u have every thing, some celebration lacks in ur weekends, please try being a football fan and wake up at 12am to watch football rather than to wish someone a shitty Happy Birthday that comes every year. Because football is HAPPINESS ❇
Peace 👌
Plz follow and upvote me i am new in steemit
@binaya please don't take offense to this but I figured I would just help you out here in case you do this on many posts. Steemit has users running around that will downvote you for comments like this, I won't because I get it you want more followers but the community may frown on you for this and by looking at your reputation score of 6 I suspect you already been getting downvotes. This post here was a very personal one that took a lot of courage for me to write and while I appreciate you trying to grow but its probably in the wrong way here by leaving a comment not related to the articles. Just as a heads up the whales see stuff like this they will downvote you till your rep is 0 and then no one will be able to see your profile which rules you out from making anything with Steemit. Don't think you are aware of that so wanted to give you a friendly bit of advice to not do this in comments because I seen many people end up with worthless accounts for it.
sorry for that .i am new here(steemit).so support me and encourage me
No need to apologize, honestly get it and your drive to grow your page. I just noticed your REP points being so low, anything below 25 usually means people with a lot of voting power have downvoted you so be careful out there in how you ask around for followers, they get so picky with how we go about it. I actually run a thing called Steemit Blogger Central on Facebook, Twitter and we have a Slack chat now...it helps people reach others and maybe a route you might want to take to grow. I resteem posts for users in our Slack so if you want here is the links for my stuff and maybe that will help you out.
https://www.facebook.com/steemitbc
https://twitter.com/steemitbc
https://sbcautoinvite.herokuapp.com/
You can post your articles and meet other Steemians on our SLACK for real time growth
Upvoting and resteeming, sweetie. I'll keep your dad in my thoughts. Hoping for the best!
I really appreciate that help, main thing right now is just getting the help to take a few issues off his back, the surgery stuff we are about to have a long talk about this week so I can find out what is the hold up and why he is not having this done. Its financial though, I am sensing the ongoing ups and downs on my parents is making him financially put it off. I plan to take my earnings here with some side holdings of BTC and combine it with this post, should help cover the fridge issue that happened today. I really appreciate the help here and spreading the word. Just to be able to help my parents with the help of this community and friends within in it is a blessing.
upvoted and retweeted. hope it all comes together.
There is no glory in unnecessary suffering.
Thanks for your help today on steem central and the slack. Much appreciated
Thank you so much buddy, I just hope at the least I can raise enough to hand over to them to at least knock something out so they can get this surgery going. I am unsure if he is just fearful to put them in debt more by doing it or what but its like you said very unnecessary but its that old school working class pride instilled in my dad. I have had enough of it though lol...gonna give him all I can out of my pocket and show him Steemit can be of help. Maybe then after he is healed up we can get him on here to thank the Steemit family. Thank you so much and no problem about the slack, glad I got you guys a place to grow together
I'm sorry to hear about your father @sflaherty. I served my country as well and it saddens me how little our governments do to help out veterans who are in need. Sending your family well wishes and hope your father gets well soon.
Reestemed.
Thank you so much my good friend. Its sad, its a strange mix....my father's stubbornness to tell anyone the extent they are going in debt and the VA constantly putting off the surgery for last minute over insurance and money. How he has prolonged this as long as he has and bared with it shocks me. I am sure this will turn out fine but maybe if I can just toss them a little something to take the debts off them or force him to take the help to get the surgery finally done will be a huge weight lifted. I know its in the few grand level though and not expecting that much help but maybe to get him the fridge he now needs would be a plus. Figures this hits them after scraping by to fill up the shelves. Thank you for the resteem, all the help I can get for them is so appreciated buddy
Tweeted, upvoted & re-steemed. Vets deserve it.
Thank you so much, my dad has no clue I did this yet but I am hopeful he will suck it up and for once let someone help him. Really means a lot to me for the help on this. I been keeping this to myself and trying to secretly pull together stuff for them in crypto but its time I wake up that a little help is needed in this area. Its a tragedy how Vets are treated after they age and unneeded by the system. Especially though that went to Vietnam, probably one of the worst messes for soldiers in 50 years.
My thoughts and prayers go out to your Dad and family, brother @sflaherty - I don't think it is anything at all to ask that your Steemit friends raise $$$ for a fridge. That's really not much to ask at all considering what your father did to fight for our freedom in a time when those who served were unappreciated and often shunned. I hope enough of us can come together to help and make a positive difference. God Bless
Thank you @lanceman , I just feel bad in a way because I am so financially rebuilding myself when they have things hitting them hard lately. Biggest hope is to raise just enough to get him this fridge, they are arguing about this and stressed out so bad lately its just not beneficial to the growing health concerns surrounding his situation. I just don't get why the VA keeps doing monthly checkups to pass him off for another month for 2 years now. I know they are keeping an eye on the situation but you would think by now that would have been done and over with. Poor insurance system for Vets in this country, risk your life to risk it more on their health ideals
I wish your father well and you and your family peace in such a stressful time. Up voted! Life has a funny way of working itself out just hang in there.
I really appreciate that help, I try to keep positive whenever stress hits...its just the hands tied situation to help when I want to help my parents that has me a little stressed. Thankfully this community and people like you make me have a little power in doing something for them and I can't express how much that means to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart from my family, every little bit helps a ton right now
Resteemed for you. Your family is in my heart. <3
Thank you so much for that, truly helps more than you know.
my mothers maiden name is flaherty and they hailed from county cork, we may be related in some way.
That would be crazy but its possible. I have family over there still, distant family but a bunch of them lol. I do know there is a ton of Flaherty's and O'Flaherty's in that region but a lot of them are related. My great grandfather came from there and settled in Connecticut, a lot of that side of the family stems from New York and Connecticut. My dad, he is a stubborn, classic Irishman about his health so I figured put this out there in hopes I can shove some money in his face and make him do what needs to be done. Really appreciate your comment, be crazy though if we are related. Followed you cousin lol
Our thoughts will be with your family Flaherty. Resteem, upvoted.
Any way to help
2Kz
I truly appreciate that my good friend. My dad is just the most stubborn guy in the world lol. Won't let anyone help so I figured its time I took charge behind his back and just raised what I can and hand it over. Not taking no for an answer on this one, he is gonna have to just get used to the idea doing it alone is not accomplishing anything. I really appreciate that support, means so much to me with your help
Most dads are stubborn man. Mine has a bad hip and he insists of going abouts the day to day the same. Being angry by pain, but not doing much about it. Its really sad to watch. There is only so much us young men can do. To help, to learn, and to not put ourselves in that position.
I agree, lol...they come from that old school you work, you feed your family and you leave when its your time respectfully. My dad is the quiet type as it is, getting a word out of him is energy wasted sometimes lol but I tell you this, he seems to put hints out there he needs help but you ask him whats going on its everything is fine. This fridge going out though was the kicker for him I think, him and my mom rented homes and apartments all their life and saved to finally buy a house about a decade ago but the finance company raised rates on all Americans here so that has been hell and due to that things in the house been unmaintained. When that went out today he tossed it up in the air that this house was going to kill him because he is sinking money in it constantly vs his health, thats when it hit me how much he is keeping the struggle to the chest.
Haha sounds like my dad. Doesn't want to leave his house... king of his castle. In our case its the kids growing up and the value of the house increasing tremendously (as we live near Toronto and the giant housing bubble).
That's just how us men are, stubborn.... hahaha
lol we will end up the same way probably, I catch myself questioning his stubborness but doing the same thing on my kids and my fiance at times lol...just rubs off on the generations over time as we age I think
I call it being a man haha
lol...very very true