On Bullying, Suicide, Self Esteem and saying F*CK YOU.

in life •  3 months ago

There was a story that crossed my Twitter feed
of a young nine-year old boy who committed suicide.
He told his mother he was gay. He told his friends at school too.
According to this young boy's mother, the kids at school said he should just kill himself.
And so he did.

CBS News Story


image source


My friend who shared this story asked:

"When will the bullying stop? I feel for this family!"

Meredith Loughran blogs on Steemit

My response was:

I was bullied & I don't think bullying will ever end.
Sadly, too many kids have NO coping mechanisms.
Self esteem isn't a given. It's earned & learned.
Being bullied SUCKS. It was brutal. I wanted to die.
But I'm this person because I was forged in that fire.


I had very dark days in my youth.
Sometimes I'd come home from school and cry into my pillow.
I never quite fit in except with a small handful of people; my real friends who are, to this day, still my real friends.
But in the midst of my pain, I could not see them. I felt so small and insignificant. Helpless. Hopeless.

Pain whispered incessantly.
No one's going to miss you.
They'd be better off without you.
You don't fit in.
No one likes you.
Your pain is never going away.
It's going to be like this forever.

Every disappointment felt like a piece of my heart was being stomped on and it felt like tiny deaths. I often wondered how many of these tiny deaths can a person take before they really die?

At the time, I was not yet assessed with Asperger's. It was difficult to process my own emotions, much less understand the motivations of others.


An uncomfortable truth.

If I had wanted to kill myself, there was plenty of time and opportunity.
It was very easy to tell myself that they'd be better off without me.
So, what stopped me?

Somewhere in the darkness was a tiny light that said, "It will get better."
"I didn't do anything to deserve their hate. They're the assholes!"
"Who cares what they think of me. How do I think of me?"
"I am not giving them any more space in my world."
"In a couple years I'll never see them again."
"I have shit to do."


In the dark place I found the strength to keep going.

Now that I'm grown, the bullies of my youth have metamorphosed into this bully called LIFE with all of its uncertain twists and gut punches.

It is a reminder that your reaction is a choice.

You want the cure for bullying? Face the demon and say "FUCK YOU"
You'll realize that little by little your armor grows stronger because of it.


Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

oh that is really sad.


Yes, it is.

There is a reason why children are considered vulnerable.

This highlights just one of the ways in which the education system has been and continues to fail up-and-coming generations - and my resentment of those who would absolve themselves of responsibility while claiming a right to shove their disabling ways down our collective throats deepens.

Depression is a horrid thing to deal with - but suicidal inclinations are not the same thing - although it is hard to not acknowledge unhappiness as being a normal shared ingredient. One can be deeply depressed but have no desire to end one's life... and it is not necessarily so that a person who sacrifices one's life was depressed.

Thank you for writing about this matter.

True, whatever you do to fit in the societies' so called standard, people will always have something to say. It wont be easy, no one said it will. I hope there will more aid on mental health. If we cant stop bullies we can support people who are victims in our own little ways.

Posted using Partiko Android

Thanks you for new support.

Bullying is something we talk about with our children. We discuss how we are all different in many ways but unfortunately there will always be evil in the world. We have to learn how to push through this and let the light shine through. Sometimes that means a fist to a bullies face.

I am also a victim of bullying and it is one factor I quit college hoping to get well and stringer before returning but it did not happen until my health deteriorated. @mereg99
Parents just have to teach their children to fight back though but it is not really possible for some children.

It's tough getting kicked when you're down...

So glad you found your way through it, and are continuing! :D