Recently, I have been re-evaluating everything in my life. How I act and react, where my money goes, who I trust or don't and why to all of it. Last night (ok, fine, about 3 am), something really hit home with me, and this morning I saw a video that got me thinking even more so about that revelation.
I was awake around midnight, and going through some social media, and just poking about aimlessly for a few hours when I ran across a post in a group that bothered me. Or rather caused me stress. I was upset because something is taking longer than expected to happen and I thought to myself, 'just another reason I should never put my trust (aka: faith) in other people to help me make things happen'. Emotionally, I felt terribly let down again. I even cried. I started to evaluate why I was upset, and the conclusion was that I was upset not with them, but at myself for having put faith (and money) in a 'fast' way to fix money issues. Hence the title 'Misplaced Faith'.
As an artist, I still struggle with faith in my abilities, sometimes just to produce something and often in sharing it with everyone. I don't quite trust it yet. My faith in how it will be received should be tied to my faith in God who gave me the gifts of creativity and compassion. So by trying to bring about money by veering off the course I know I should be on I get disappointed. But it is in myself really. My faith should be in God and not 'quick fixes' because frankly, not one of those quick fixes has ever done anything but cause me a great deal of stress while I wait for it to pan out. So why do I keep trying them? Lack of trust. Plain and simple. I need to continually re-evaluate why and what I do. I need to learn trust. I need to take fear and panic out of my actions.
The video I watched about 10 minutes before writing this, reiterated the 'no one can do stuff for you' idea. I wish I could share it with you, but it was shared with me through a friend's 'Dani Johnson - Insider' subscription. Basically, it said, the only person who can move me to a different place is me. I have to change my thought process. My way of thinking and find or learn the things that work for me and my goals. This means I have to have faith in myself through my faith God. It's a choice really. I have always felt drawn to share beauty and inspiration, but the fear-based mentality of never having enough has completely ruled my life and it needs to end. What is important is love, family, and faith. Those will be my priority going forward.
I am not saying that having faith and trust in people is wrong by any means, but it should not be your first stop in the process of living. Thanks for reading :)