This Explains Just About Every Bad Relationship You Ever Had

in life •  last year

Screen Shot 2018-02-14 at 10.46.59 AM.png

It's Valentine's Days in some parts of our known Universe today, an opportunity for many people to regurgitate consumerist habits and try to prove their "love" with expensive gifts.

For unknown reasons, though, the only image that popped up to my mind when I thought about "love" was the one above.

Before clicking on to it, let me tell you a bit more about it (hint: although it looks like it's a movie, it isn't, it's just a screenshot, the movie from which it's taken will be embedded further down).

The picture comes from a TED talk, one that I recently saw. And the role of the image was to point something so obvious, yet so easily forgettable: love is never in the outer object. Love is inside. Love is never happening "outside", it's merely an outside materialization of inside propensities and yearnings.

What we perceive as being "outside", the triggers of our internal responses, are merely images on a wall. Most of them far more accurate than the wall drawing above, but, ultimately, they're just moving pictures on a screen. A screen onto which our mind projects feelings that we agree to consider "real". They're not, but we agree to their "intrinsic reality" to such a point that we start to suffer and get ill because of them.

So, most of the time, if we complain that "the other" doesn't get us, doesn't understand us, doesn't reciprocate our feelings or doesn't fulfill our expectations, it's because "the other" is merely a picture on a wall, to which we're nervously - and most of the time, ridiculously - trying to get its smell.

If you want to spend 12 minutes of today celebrating love, I highly suggest you to watch this TED talk.

And it doesn't cost you anything.

I'm a serial entrepreneur, blogger and ultrarunner. You can find me mainly on my blog at Dragos Roua where I write about productivity, business, relationships and running. Here on Steemit you may stay updated by following me @dragosroua.

Dragos Roua

Wanna know when you're getting paid?

I know the feeling. That's why I created, an easy to use and accurate tool for calculating your Steemit rewards

It's free to use, but if you think this is a useful addition, I'd appreciate your witness vote.

Thank you!

Psst: new to Steemit? Start Here

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

Great video! very inspiring.... Poor man even got busy signal at the suicide hotline....Hilarious!

Morning @dragosroua. Didn't realise you were a Michael Neil fan. That's something else we have in common! 😊

That's the first video I've seen of him on Steemit.


Just discovered him, when @raluca sent me this video, but I'm slowly becoming a fan, I guess :)


He's actually moved on a lot since that video. I think that was when he was just beginning his shisft from NLP to the 3 Principles. He's been on quite a "journey".

I felt identified a lot with what he had to say about suicide, i've gone trough a similar state of depression and suicidal thoughts too and he really makes you put it into perspective... maybe those really are not my thoughts.

This talk reminded me of what Butch Hartman says about fear "Get to the point where fear fears YOU!" thanks for sharing it :-D

Dogs sniffing each other are exactly the kind of images that I think of for Valentine's :)))


great minds...


... it was funny because my avatar is a dog :P


Now, that I zoom in, I can see it. But until today I was convinced it was a penguin.


Haha, just noticed that!!

I watched the vedio.. everyone needs to be seen Great video! very inspiring post...

Well, we don't celebrate valentine in my place (probably the whole country.)

Love is never in the outer object. Love is inside. Love is never happening "outside", it's merely an outside materialization of inside propensities and yearnings.

Such is wisdom...

I remember at time where we celebrated "Mother's Day" as children and then someone told us that it's not in our traditions but something we got from west. And it's not even a good tradition to choose a day of the year to show gratitude to parents. You should do that all the years long!!

I think love is the same thing.

Thanks for sharing this TED Talk, Dragos! It brighten up my morning! Oops, it's already afternoon.

This is reality I think it is not love that love is measured by bigs gift. Love is love which to measure is impossible. love is vast than sky, Its a bigger than our thoughts.

nice learning post sir thanks for sharing

I like your post
this paper is very interesting

Happy Valentine's Day

I love TED talk. I would like to add that true love is not a temporary feeling like infatuation, love is rather a state of intimacy that results from repeating or long-lasting feelings. Cheers! : )

Sorry something found on internet:

Provoking thoughts on what we love, and how we get inside the wall of what's presented to the world.