Putting My Health First, FINALLY! If At First You Don't Succeed, And All That Jazz! I WILL Find A Way To Fit This Blockchain Stuff In To My Life. AKA The Perils Of Being A Human...

Gaaaaaahhhh!

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OK OK, maybe that's not the most conventional way to open a post but wow, the frustration is so great, that's pretty much the sound I make most days now as I ponder my growing to-do lists and unfulfilled ambitions and goals.

Life can be hard man! I know, I know, it's infinitely preferable to the alternative, right? Sometimes though, you just want everything to fall in to place, the stars to align and parliament to combust... Oops I should skip the politics, I am just not in the frame of mind to objectively tackle the grimy subject of those jokers, criminals and inept freeloaders right now.

It feels like every-time I sit down to finally write a post these days I need to begin by saying why I didn't manage to consistently stick around last time I said I would... Simple and short answer... LIFE.

More accurately, life, health, family and work.

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More recently the health has been the biggie, which in turn has had a knock on effect on the other three. I haven't been myself for quite some time and around a month ago had to take sick-time from work due to excruciating neck/back/skeletal and/or muscular pain, I'm not sure exactly which as I am still trying to chase down my X-Ray results, several weeks later.

But I knew this was just the tip of a much bigger iceberg that I had neglected to address properly - Dumb! You see I suffer from diabetes and must confess I have never really taken it all that seriously. Fast forward to the last 6-9 months... Blurred vision, profuse sweating, intense stomach pains, 962 night time loo runs, a strange internal tremor and an incredible fatigue and an angry all conquering skin infection that could easily be straight off the set of the walking dead.

All signs pointed to diabetic complications - Not fun.

It may sound bizarre that I could have all these symptoms and more that I've not mentioned and still not hear the blaring siren or spot the huge blinking red light that accompanied it. The problem is that they all flared at different times and I put them down to my job, lifestyle, diet, drinking, approaching 50 blah blah blah...

Although I reckon that subconsciously I had ((on some level)) already joined the increasingly obvious dots, but acknowledging that, would mean taking action, right? Maybe even facing up to my fallibility and I guess, even mortality... Wow this got morbid fast!!!

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Anyway to get right to the point instead of sounding like a self pitying, attention seeking #*xxx$£% and dragging this out for another 76 paragraphs, I took the grown up decision and decided to grab on to my health with both hands and am making massive strides.

I have lost 10 pounds this week already and although that sounds excessive I had put on quite a bit of weight recently on holiday and just generally neglecting my health like a five star fool, so it has literally fallen away. I feel like somebody has peeled away an unwelcome layer, revealing a glimpse of who lies beneath...

I like what I see and I like how I'm beginning to feel again.

Contrary to the over-riding theme of this post thus far, I am no fool and realise that things like this that have been allowed to deteriorate for so long are not turned around in a mere week. Yup, of course I realise that the road to great health and cultivating a dynamic feeling of energy, vitality and well-being take time and will have many peaks and troughs along the way.

This is not another false start for me - although there have been many.

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I have spent many years learning about great nutrition, foods that harm, foods that heal and such and applying almost none of it, if I'm gonna be completely honest with myself and let's face it, if you are gonna lie to someone don't let it be to the one person on the planet who absolutely knows you are being a spineless worm unwilling to be accountable to even the most basic facets of health, lying to yourself is like yelling at a bucket to get up and walk - pointless and utterly disappointing.

I am enjoying my resurgence immensely and hope to be the proverbial phoenix when it comes to my life, health, dreams and ambitions, after all I can think of nothing else more pressing to my life than to be all I can be and achieve all I am capable of, can you?

Writing this has been cathartic for me. I have acknowledged some of my biggest failings and moreover I have accepted them and placed them here because as we all know, the blockchain NEVER forgets. Make no mistake this has not been a voyeuristic invitation to a pity-party, far from it. Firstly it is an admission, secondly if this post has found you at a low ebb or in need of some changes to your life...

Go do it! Be who you REALLY are beneath that veneer of denial and shake off those doubts. Become all that you can be.

If you need a little help, specific health advice or inspiration, drop me a line or find me on Discord - Same name.

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