Being Yourself Even When It's Not "Appropriate"
When presented with a sticky situation it can be hard to know how to act. Do you choose to be what the situation seemingly dictates you to be, or to just be yourself no matter what? This 3 minute video tells a quick story of how an ex-girlfriend recently shared some bad news with me, and how I decided to react in a way that felt good to me, rather than with a sullen face and somber attitude.
Music:
In Your Robotic Heart - Hooksounds.com
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I'm really great at being a chameleon especially in social situations. I'm not extroverted in big groups, I'm the silent observer and only give input when I feel it compliments. When I am one on one with a person, I become more much confident in myself and really present many more facets of the person I am. A big thing for me is confidence and the fear of conflicting with others. I'm definitely trying to work on it.
I really like the way that you tell your stories, I think you handled the situation in a great way. Sometimes in the face of heavy situations we need a little light, a little laughter to remind us that we are capable of moving through what's being thrown our way. You lead as a great example. 😊
I get the sense that this fear could largely be alleviated just be redefining your understanding of conflict. What if you could explore conflict without being at odds with someone? For instance, if you disagree with someone, what if you said, "That's interesting. Can I ask you a question that may conflict with what you just said?"
I think some people feel attacked when they're contradicted, but if you could find a way to make it clear that you're not attacking them, and that you want to understand them better and build your collective understanding, then I think you would be able to feel more confident while also honoring your values of who you want to be (someone who harmonizes with and adds to the people around her).
Now that I write that out, conflict sounds like the opposite of those values. So maybe you can find a way to confidently harmonize, with the understanding that singing in harmony with another requires your voices to be different, otherwise it wouldn't be harmonized, it would be monotone.
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