This Post is The Only Post You Will Not Read All Day
I Have No Idea What I'm About To Say
I'm just writing this because it looks professional.
"I can't believe it's almost April."
I heard someone say that today.
A rush of someone's stupidity entered my mind like an instance of writer's block during a simile. I said nothing. She wasn't speaking to me anyway.
It's not normal to say something like, "Well what the fuck, lady? Did you think it was going to be March for the rest of your life?"
It's tempting though. One of these days I'm going to snap.
Small Talk is Okay
I guess.
Them: "Sure is sunny out today!"
Me in my mind: "Wow! You noticed the Sun, did you? Well that sure is something. How about that local sports team? I saw them playing with their balls again. What do you think about that?"
Me out loud: "Yup. Sunny days are nice."
It Happens at the Drive-thru.
Bite your tongue or they will spit in your food.
Them: "Would you like fries with that?"
Me in my mind: "Did I say fries or did I say two burgers and a coffee! Stop wasting my time!"
Me out loud: "No thanks."
Sometimes they ask me if I'm sure. My eyelids twitch when that happens, I think. Something feels weird on my face so I assume it's my eyelids twitching. "No! I'm not sure! So I'm going to sit here for ten minutes and think about it, okay!"
It Happens at The Store
"Is that all for you today?"
Me in my mind: "No." Now I'll just stand here and say nothing while you give me a blank stare for as long as it takes to get through this moment. I got all day.
Me out loud: "That's it."
Them: "Have a good day, sir."
Me in my mind: "Fuck you."
Me out loud: "You too."
Everywhere I Go
I'm surrounded by what seem like robots.
Then I got to thinking just now.
Robots here: "Nice post! I love you long time follow follow 100%!"
Many of us don't mind telling those small talking robots to lick our balls or vaginas.
The robot never responds.
Hmm
I wonder.
I might test this out on the streets just to see what happens. What if these people really are robots?
Aren't smart people like Elon Musk trying to figure out if we're living inside of a simulation or not? The only way to really find out is to push the limits of the programming, right?
What if their heads pop?
Will I have to clean that up?
Will I go to jail for murder, or just pay a fine?
Too many questions. Not enough answers.
I better go think about this more.
Have a nice day.
We're 100% living in a simulation, maybe I'll go out in the street and act manic, dancing in front of people - I already know what's going to happen though. They're going to avoid eye contact at all costs and walk around me.
I think it's society's fault, they train you to be a robot from inception.
You're a lucky guy today.
This is my 10000th post!
What do I get for it?
Fuck all!
You get a full vote though. Why not! What robot would do that shit!
Now go dance!
No robot would ever do that!
dances
My mouse seems to be broken. I've been clicking on 'click here' for quite some time.
Maybe your click here is defective?
Damn, maybe it only works if it can answer the questions?
It worked for me and thank fuck, it just warned me about the 5000 viruses that've been lying dormant in my PC
I had that problem too! I signed up for their service, gave them my credit card numbers(they said the first three didn't work and I hate when that happens) and then they gave me a fancy new virus detector suite with solitaire and a free wallpaper! Everything seems to be working fine now except for my speakers. I can hear phone calls, I think? Someone is talking to me but I don't understand their language. I just turn the volume down. Easy fix.
Nobody trains you. Anytime you want you can decide to take 100% control of your life. But most people are too afraid of the amount of power that will bring. We are very powerful but it's too scary to step into that space fast so we baby step it.
If you start dancing in public of course people will ignore you. There is so much stuff happening all the time why would they stop for this? How will it improve their life? This is no proof of a simulation.
We are definitely conditioned by society though, just look at the different cultural and religious beliefs around the world. That is conditioning of the masses
Never said it was proof, just saying it's impossible to disprove the simulation theory (even if those guys at Oxford claimed they've done it).
Guessing you didn't find this through #funny?
Society is just humans. Yes we have different cultures in the world. The masses all have an effect on each other. There are many interesting cultures around the world.
The world is being created from within people and the more you have control of that part the more you can generate any experience that you want.
So me and @twiceuponatime were trying to come up with the perfect song for you to usher in April and illustrate for the bots your "Yup. Sunny days are nice." comment.
I think we found it!!!
That kiss at the start was so passionate and along with the flirting that came after, I thought you sent me some sort of strange vintage porn video.
Call me crazy but I like this sound. It reminds me of an old group called the Ink Spots. Some of their music was featured in a video game I used to play.
You are crazy.
You're welcome.
You got me there.
Got that same vibe lolll staring so sexually into each others eyes.. geez
Those two were not hiding the fact they enjoy each other's company.
Hey i didn't mind either... lol
I would love if their heads pop.. with confetti and shit..
And that whistling sound.
Them: "How are you today?"
Me in my Mind: "Life's in shambles because I'm paying a lawyer to screw me in family court that has no desire to listen to facts or truth. I'm on my last shred of sanity."
Me out loud: I'm good.
--- sometimes you get REALLY tired of this and you feel like you're going to SNAP---. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this ways sometimes. What I started to do to alleviate some of this is -- is saying something really off the cuff when they ask these questions:
Them: "Did you find everything you were looking for?"
Me out loud: Patting down my pockets... I seem to have misplaced that million dollars, I'm thinking on isle 7? And Mr. Prince Charming, I think may have gotten distracted by the honeydews in produce..."
Then just smile and wait. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.
I find it relieves some of the pressure from time to time.
I do that too. Instead of lashing out and going crazy on someone, I'll crack jokes. Even if they're more awkward than funny. Something stupid like that actually helps.
This is small talk.
btw I notice most of your drawings have been red lately. They say red's associated with anger and passion.
You been passionately angry at something?
They say a lot of things. What they don't realize is; I like to fuck with them.
I'm not angry. I know people associate red with anger. That's how they see it though, or, they were trained to think that way. I see red clearly. It's easy for me to stare at for long periods of time because I like the color. I find it attractive. You'll see a lot of red here but might notice some of them have a similar theme. It's part of a massive project I've been working on for a long time. It would actually be lame if I produced the art then said, "Here's piece number nine of blah blah blah thing I'm working on." You wouldn't be here, following, commenting, voting if that was the approach I was to take. I'd just be another art post.
I'm actually curious about what that project is now. Are you going to make like a huge collage of all the red artwork and it'll all come together to create something?
You do make it interesting. I'm bored of seeing typical posts nowadays, with the typical "blog" format.
Especially those 'how to' articles. They always gotta blabber some unnecessary bullshit in the first paragraph. Always. Ever noticed that?
I used to like red as my favorite color, but now it's royal blue.
Yeah, I'm building something piece by piece. It'll take a long time though so there's no real point in mentioning what it is until I'm finished.
Till then we gotta play jigsaw with all the available artworks.
This got me laughing out loud😁😁😁 oh you are so dramatic but on a serious note some statements are questions are so annoying like in the restaurant, if i wanted fries I would have requested for it, why ask me if I'm sure? That's fucking annoying. Nice post as always @nonameslefttouse
That 'sure' thing is probably the most annoying one, and I am sure of that.
Why is being honest considered rude?
I would like the least amount of faux pleasantries with this necessary interaction, please. Fuck you.
If there was a thing that I wanted that wasn't here, could you order it for me? No? Then why would I wait 10 more minutes for you to tell me that?
Also, my resting bitch face is not a reflection of you. I am a bitch. Fuck off.
Seriously, though...these service people are actually required to say these things. It is a script. Upsale, upsale, upsale. A lot of companies operate on a Leave It To Beaver mentality--if you make something feel "comfortable" and friendly, people will buy more, they will be returning customers, they will recommend the business to others.
So, I guess we just don't say these things in our heads, 'cause we know it isn't that poor fucks intention to be an ass--its their job. Poor fucks got it hard already.
So, hats off to you! You are doing one good deed at a time by maintaining social niceties.
People think they need to follow this script in business; in reality, they're just being lazy.
I worked in retail. Mainly in the back but I'd be on the sales floor quite often. People would ask me things like, "Which one of these vacuums is good?" I'd say, "Well, they all suck."
Unfortunately, companies require this from their employees. Have you ever been to the burrito place "Moe's?" They are required to yell at you when you walk in the door. Definitely not gonna keep the business of introverts.
--Not all vacuums just suck, some blow too :)
At Micheal's art supply store, now they ask"Did you find everything you were looking for?" Since they don't carry the full line of colors of the brand of paint I use, I should keep an audio file of U2 singing the chorus to "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" and just shake my head and play it every time I checkout.
I used to work in retail. They played that song over the sound system several times per week. I actually had a customer approach me and sing-along with that song while I was working. I shit you not. She needed those little pads you stick on the bottom of chair legs so the chairs don't scratch the floor. I remember it like it was yesterday.
"Vertigo" was the goal song for the Montreal Canadiens the year I had season tickets. I think I need therapy because associating something awesome with U2 caused some trauma.
Yeah; you should probably get that checked.
Do you want people to follow you in real life? What if they never stop? What if they follow you from the shops and all the way home? Will you have to buy a bigger house to accommodate all the people who follow you, or because you are doing a follow for follow will you be able to come up with some sort of house sharing rota - some days at yours, some days at theirs?
Oh this follow for follow is so complicated.
100% follow follow means 100% follow follow. So easy, even a robot can do it.
I'd like two cheeseburgers and a strawberry shitpost please and yes, I'm sure
Are you sure you're sure?
Well I thought I was, but maybe I do need another minute or two.
Now this is where I say, "Take your time."
See! We're all robots!