Filipino Jokes Translated for Western Tastes Part 46

in #funny5 years ago

Giphy

Good day, my fellow Steemers and Whalesharers! This is the 46th part of my series post about local Filipino jokes which I have translated for people of the English language. Please check out Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31,32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, and 45. Please read and pick the ones you like best. Tell me in the comments section on why you liked it.

I think nobody in Steemit and Whaleshares has done this kind of post series before. So I took it upon myself to do it even if you think it might not be popular or profitable. I just wanted to be the first to do this kind of thing. It would be up to you to decide, my fellow readers, if I was successful or not.

There are still a lot more Filipino local jokes that we need to be translating. These jokes are the products of the Filipinos' creativity, ingenuity, and love of social drinking.

Read and enjoy!



Fear of heights

KID: Grandpa, I am afraid to climb up high places. I am so scared that I would fall.
GRANDPA: I am going to teach you a secret. So that no matter how high you climb, you will never fall.
KID: Really? What is it, grandpa?
GRANDPA: If you are about to fall, just jump! In that way you did not fall and you'll be considered very brave by everyone because you jumped!


Fart beats

John was riding a commuter bus. He felt a terrible urge to fart noisily because of the beans he ate at breakfast. So he decided to release his farts by the beat of the heavy dance music playing in the background to avoid embarassement.

And so he did. As he was about to exit the bus at the bus stop, he noticed that many of the passengers had hateful stares at him.

He forgot to remove his headphones while riding the bus!


Tree

Giphy

JOHNNY: Dad, what kind of tree is that one that can't be climbed?
DAD: A banana tree because it's too short?
JOHNNY: Wrong! It's a tree that got cut by logging!


Shaving velocity

NELSON: How many times do you shave in a week?
MEL: Oh, about 20 times.
NELSON: How do you do it?
MEL: I am a barber!


Heaven's place

Giphy

PRIEST: My child, there is no place in heaven for gays...
GAY MAN: Okay, Father. If heaven isn't the place for us, then our gay souls shall go to the rainbow!



Translated from Source: http://www.jokespinoy.com/


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