Dreams Crushed And My Car Repossessed
"Earl the car is gone. They took it."
This is what I heard when I woke up this morning. My wife was heading out to go to work. That plan was canceled. I don't even want to talk about what lead to this but as I told her and as I'll say again, It's my fault.
Then I started to think about all the decisions in my life that has lead me to this particular point in life. It all centers around my desire to do meaningful work and work that I actually enjoy.
Well I am usually not the "What if" "Coulda" "Shoulda" "Woulda" type of person. But out of all the things in my life that has happened I am willing to give this moment an exception because I have been on the brink of suicide just thinking about it in the past. This is not something to just brisk over. I had been molded to live a certain lifestyle just as many others are for 22 years until I came to my "Ikigai" moment. As a matter of fact it's really more recently that I've gotten a sense of my Ikigai. All those years of being indoctrinated. Go to college. Get a job. Have a career. Retire. That is exactly what I had been on the path to do for 22 years of my life.
Don't drink the indoctrination juice
I am now 24 and I am not committing myself to be indoctrinated any longer. I also have my wife and my little girl. My little girl will have many interests over the course of here life and I will do everything in my power to make sure she develops the skills in the areas she is interested in. I have to allow her to flourish and truly be herself. My upbringing taught me alot and this is why I am going to use my experiences to show her how to embrace herself and who she is. I am taking control even though I know I can't control alot of what happens in life. Should I crush my daughter's dreams like mine were crushed so many times?
Would I have been in the situation to get my car repossessed if I had been encouraged to explore my interests at the age of 14 or 15?
What would I be doing if I had raged against the machine at an earlier age and chose my own path instead of waiting so long?
Would I have had the money to keep up with those car payments?
Would my health have declined so much to the point of being unrecognizable by my own wife if I had followed my own energy?
Go beast mode and let nothing stop me from doing what I was put on this Earth to do. Yes it's personal and I have this chip on my shoulder that I will constructively use as fuel. This is just what I needed to push my self to the next level. I feel sorry for whatever or whoever is trying to stop me from being HumanEarl. I mean no harm, I'm just passionate.
The rage begins and the fire rises!
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Oh @humanearl my friend... don't crush her dreams and don't should on yourself.
The "system" is toxic, designed only to make us compliant sheep in a machine designed to benefit the few at the top of the pyramid. It exploits everyone. When you're struggling at the bottom, your old wreck is repo'd, when you're the corporate manager your new Mercedes is repo'd. It's still the same picture.
YOU have the courage to break free of those chains... and that's a large part of what matters most. In fact, it's the key... you've looked behind the curtain, seen what's there and rejected it.
"The car is gone" sucks. Next time, you power down a bit, buy a car with CASH that can't be taken back and thumb your nose at the system that wants to exploit people with finance charges, interest and fees.
This, too, shall pass.
In the meantime, teach your little angel that she can be ANYthing she wants to be.
I'm going to do my best not to limit her abilities.
We are all being pimped is how I like to put it.
Thanks for your post!
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I really like this post. It so real and human and raw. Its refreshing to hear someone taking responsibility for their own path. We all have been there and done the shift he blame to someone else thing, it not until we accept responsibility for our own life and choices that we find that we had the control all the time. Kudos to you sir for finding this truth at the early age of 24! And also for discovering Steemit and this wonderful supportive community. I wish you the very best for the future. You have a new follower! Salud from sunny Cancun 😉
@donnaincancun This means alot to me. So thank you for being here to support. What I hope to continue to do is to be raw and real with people. I feel like we have enough fakeness in society. People need to embrace themselves and learn to be authentic. Hopefully I can inspire people to do so.
Salud!
your right on that...plus its neat
It's not too late. I, too, have been a part of a family that is accustomed to that system. Most of asian families are like that. sadly, in all of my siblings, I was the only one who woke up and acted even if it means rebelling, just to do what I really love to do. Don't take that away from your daugther and yourself. It's not too late for everything. Go forth in life head on!
Good for you! I know it's not easy and I'm pretty sure you got a lot of criticism for it
I think your life experience will make you an excellent parent seeing how you’ve been through the ups and down. A lot of parents put immense stress on their children with their expectations and try to mold them in ways that don’t necessarily fit. I’m sure your daughter will succeed in many of her interests! All the best
I want to give her room to flourish and grow and I don't want to rush her growth either. It may take time but I want her to know that she has my support. Thanks for the encouragement.
Never crush your baby girl dreams my friend...i`m in close situation like yours and all i can tell you...never give up...ppl like us make this world go round...not others! Have faith in yourself and your path no matter what! Goodluck, God help us all!
I really appreciate it and I will keep encouraging my girl as she gets older .
You are a great human being and I wish all your and your girls dream come true. Steem all the way.
Comments like these make my day. I appreciate it alot. Thanks for being here and contributing.
Emotional stress, stress of work, upturn and uptake of the relationship sometimes distracts the mind. We lost ourselves then we are The power to control yourself also seems to be running out.
It is said that many of the physical diseases are due to mental illness. If the mind is distracted then all of the activities are hampered. If you can not keep yourself under control, then the dominant status also goes out of reach. And what is not in control is more difficult to control. So self-control is important. Self-control is a great tool to make yourself successful.
Meditation is a very useful thing to keep your mind under control. When negative thoughts come to mind, mental stability decreases. Such thinking weakens the mental strength. Regular meditation habits help to calm the mind and keep it strong.
I recently tried meditating. I must say it does make a world of difference.
If you really want to control the mind, then take the mind away from the negative thoughts. Get out of the environment of being depressed. If something is too much of a problem or is painful, skip it for a while. Pay attention to any other work.
Oh yes, I agree with you that we must build our lives as we want right now without looking back to the past. Children are always beautiful and we do everything for them that is within our power and if we have the strength to make children's dreams real, then we must do this, even if our dreams are sometimes unworkable. I believe that children need to dream and this is the meaning of life! Thank you @humanearl
It makes no sense to me how children are told to dream as much as they want but when they become adults they are told to stop dreaming and be "real".
You are right when we grow up many dreams go away and so let our children dream while they are still small, this is their golden time!
life has weird stages and most of them you just want to give up but I know everything will get better :) My dad has schizophrenia ever since i was born and i know mental health from what you are going through is totally different but as a child of my father and from a daughter's perspective i never got the support i always wanted growing up, its hard when your mom is always at work and your dad is just at home talking to himself.I try to find ways to get that support growing up because i couldn't understand my situation and most of the time you get it from the wrong people. its hard when everything is falling apart and you feel alone. So please never crush your daughter's dreams give her endless support that you can provide and she will find her way in life even if everything is hard because she knows her dad always got her back :)
@nessyquel I'm sorry to hear your story. That really sucks. That's why I'm here. To offer encouragement and support for people who otherwise are not getting it elsewhere. I hope you are in a much better place.
And thank you I plan on giving my little girl room to flourish as a person. I can't stifle her talents.
thank you @humanearl :) and I am in a much better place i still live at home with my family but my mindset is much better :) growing up I had a lot of questions to why but eventually I found them out and you just need to let things happen but never lose hope, I always have a saying that if your are born unfortunate and if you die unfortunate its going to be your fault and you have no one else to blame but yourself because you had a lifetime to change it. and thank you for supporting people like us ,you give a human side here at steemit that people really need
Believe in your daughter dream and always support her towards it. Don't crush her dreams instead motivate her until her dream comes true. Sure one day you will be proud for your daughter :)
I plan on giving her the green light to be herself and use her talents and gifts.