A man's desire for a woman can override common sense. If he wants her badly enough then he'll make a move, get shot down and settle for being her friend just so that he can be around her long enough to maybe someday change her mind. I fell into this trap once and the best way to explain to you why orbiting doesn't work is to show you how it happened.

I was young and stupid. This was back before I realized that you can't negotiate desire so I allowed this woman (let's call her Natalie) to turn me into her pet. I was friend-zoned so hard that we spent 4 nights out of 7 sleeping in the same bed despite the fact that she had her own room just down the hall. I made a move on her the first the time she entered my bed but she rebuffed my attempts and made to go back to her own place.

That was the turning point. Instead of letting her go and turning my attention to more promising prospects, I chose the simp option and offered my friendship which was basically a reward for her turning me down. Stupid, Stupid, STUPID.

I let her tame me. Some nights I'd wake up and find her ass-cheeks hanging out of her shorts, teasing me to take a bite and instead of grabbing it I chose to be 'respectful'. I was so domesticated that even her boyfriend wasn't threatened by how much time we spent together. He's probably still laughing at how stupid I was and he's right to.

There was one night when Natalie and her boyfriend argued so hard I was certain that it was my chance to be Captain Save-A-Hoe and prove to her that I was the better option. But it didn't end up that way. Like just about every other woman out there, she preferred to be with the cheating asshole (him) than the boring beta (me).

I don't know what it was that sparked me into action, but eventually I put my balls on the table and told Natalie that if it wasn't going to happen between us then we should spend some time apart. She went ballistic and accused me of being a shitty friend and you know what...she was right. I was keeping my true desires a secret and came at her sideways which was wrong of me.

Best Friend = Emotional Tampon

My friendship with Natalie ended there. It hurt like a bitch but it was good for me. The experience taught me a lesson that I should have learnt years prior- men and women cannot be just friends. If you want to sleep with the girl and she isn't into it then let her go. Her presence in your life will only do more harm than good.

A year or two later I found myself in a similar situation again. A woman that I'd been sleeping with decided that we should be strictly platonic. Before my experience with Natalie, I would have accepted that shitty deal and be her 'best friend', allowing her to use me as her emotional tampon while I worked on changing her mind but experience is the best teacher. I rejected the hell out of that arrangement and walked away with my head held high.

The reason that I'm telling you this is because I see many other men making the some mistake. They hang around hotties who have no interest in giving it up but they can't escape the gravitational pull of the hotties' sex. Just like the many moons that orbit Jupiter, gravity will keep them close but the tidal forces will always keep them at the perfect distance to watch an alpha-asteroid come out of nowhere and smash the hell out of her.