SPIRITUAL HEADSHIP OR SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP

--It hurts to see believers struggling in their marriage, worst thing is that the problem is not even the devil, the bad guy is just chilling his own, it is Church doctrines that are killing our marriages. Please meditate on this now that you are still single, before you let one pastor's opinion mess you up.

"SPIRITUAL HEADSHIP and SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP"

I got this mail from a lady who was worried that her husband hardly ever initiates Bible study or prayer devotions at home. She felt there was spiritual leadership missing from their marriage, and in turn she was growing bitter, frustrated and angry at her husband's lack of drive towards leading spiritual exercises at home.

The truth is, there are a lot of married women who carry this same mentality about their husband not being "a spiritual leader" because initiating spiritual activities at home is not his area of strength. Worst is, there are single people too who are living on this belief and have set high spiritual leadership expectations on the men they will end up with.

Please understand this guys;
Spiritual “headship” and "Spiritual leadership" are not the same thing. A spiritual leader isn’t one who can lead devotions –but one who lives a life of devotion to Jesus, that overflows into every part of their life.

You know that verse about “the head of a wife” being her husband (I Corinthians 11) ? Well, that’s the real thing. I totally agree with the reality that there are specific roles in marriage assigned by God that we don’t want to mess with. One is the pure fact that the head of a wife is her husband.

But in truth, spiritual “HEADSHIP” and spiritual “LEADERSHIP” are two very different things that we shouldn’t get confused.

... A spiritual leader is a person who's life is modelled in the example of Christ. It is not a role assigned to a man or to a Woman to perform, but something we are all free to pursue in our love walk with God ( Galatians 3:28).

But A Spiritual head is the man God has placed in your life to be the guide and shepherd over you in marriage. That is his duty, that is a role you cannot assume.

Spiritual LEADERSHIP is not defined by a man’s ability to engage us in Bible study or lead in devotions, never! . As awesome as it is for a man to pull out his Bible, gather his family together and share some verses, or do a devotional –it is still not the mark of spiritual leadership. We all have different spiritual strength, your primary spiritual giftings might be teaching and evangelism, while your husband’s giftings can be faith and charity. Both of these giftings reflect Jesus in different ways. If we were to base the spiritual leadership of our partner on who initiates bible study and devotions– it wouldn’t do justice to the spiritual leadership he displays in all the other areas of his life, areas like his patience, his understanding, his humility, his gentle speaking, his slow anger, and his character.

So dear wife;
if he's not taking any steps towards leading spiritual activities why don't you take charge? Try starting the morning devotions and wake him up to join in. Start the Bible study sessions, assign the spiritual duties, give him a role, It doesn't mean leading devotions makes you the spiritual head, nope, leading devotions doesn't even mean you're stronger than him spiritually, recognize that he's your spiritual head, a title assigned to him by God after you said I DO, but spiritual leadership is something any one of you can take charge.

Dear husbands;
If leading devotions is not your area of strength, encourage your wife to lead, support their efforts, if possible you share the duties, and then stand in and act like their guide. Don't leave your wife hanging with the responsibility of doing it alone, don't give the kids the impression that she's the head, because they don't understand these things, stand in the gap for your family with your area of spiritual strength, and also be physically active to support your wife.
potential wives;

Dear potential wives;
It is placing high spiritual expectations on our men that got us here in the first place. I know it is right to desire marriage with a man who will always take charge of spiritual things at home, but also recognize the spiritual leadership quality in you too, it is not a position assigned to one partner, but something that both or either of you can assume.

Dear potential husbands;
See, desire spiritual things, men are natural leaders with different areas of strength, don't nurture other areas of leadership and allow this one suffer. I cannot speak in tongues is not an excuse, desire the gifts, ask God for a spiritual baptism, learn to fast beyond the usual 6-12, learn to stay up and keep vigil with prayers, lean to read a bible verse each day, these are the ways we build our spiritual strength, by practicing, start now!

If you read this to the end I celebrate you! And I know you have been blessed!