BEASTLY TALES

THE ZOOLOGIST

If you are yearning to find out who’s who,
When you, and your family are visiting a zoo,
What you need is nothing less than a zoologist,
Kind of an animal biologist/psychologist.
When you near the enclosure for giraffe,
You don’t want to hear the snide laugh,
Of someone that knows for certainty,
The physiology of the Giraffe’s “pertain-ty”
Sometimes there are signs that do edify,
But mostly there’s not a thing to tell you what and why.
Take, for example, the area for Gorillas.
Such animals are inestimably exciting, yes thrillers.
But beyond their name, and that they come from Africa.
There’s not much else that would stop any bicker,
Of course, in a large zoological garden,
For ignorance as to exhibits you would say ‘pardon’.
But a little research would not go amiss.
For example, why do snakes often hiss?

Now enter stout Tommy Trunder,
Always in a bit of a blunder.
Tommy went to the zoo with his granny.
His granny was Scottish, but not very canny.
She went to the Tea Shop, for refreshments you see.
Which Tommy thought boring, so he did flee.
He found his way to the Tiger’s area,
The sun was low, so it was glarier.
Tommy did “accidentally” jump the fence,
Of course it was no accident, so let’s not be dense!
Tommy was a most disobedient kid,
Let’s be honest, he was not the “full quid”.
Anything he was told not to do,
He urgently found he must pursue.
So a detour into the Tiger’s cage,
Ticked all the boxes, was just the rage!

Tommy appeared to the Tiger to be new,
Perhaps something interesting to chew.
So, with one enormous leap,
He jumped and pinned down the creep.
Tommy very nearly froze,
As the Tiger nibbled his toes.
But, just then, the keeper did arrive,
Allowing Tommy to survive.
The keeper, who was rather stout,
Did, in a loud voice, call out,
“Hey, Tiger”, for that was his name,
“Put the kid down, although you we don’t blame,”
“Trespassing is what the kid did,”
“And he doesn’t look like he is the “full quid”,”
“You simply don’t know where he has been.”
“And he doesn’t look at all clean.”
“So spit him out, and I’ll get your feed.”
“And that can be my daily good deed.”