BEASTLY TALES

THE ROYAL NAVY

Rule Britannia,
Britannia rule the sea,
Britain will always have a Royal Navy.
History of Britain’s Royal Navy,
Annals of valour quite wavy.
From Francis Drake, these histories,
To Horatio Nelson, such mysteries.
Records are filled with both facts and fiction,
And held aloft, with much conviction.
Royal Navy captains were severe indeed,
But valorous overall, a very brave breed,
Along with this they could be quite cruel,
They were loath to suffer any fool,
And would hand out punishments that involved a whip,
To maintain discipline aboard their ship,
A “cat o’nine tails” was frequently used,
On a crew that was so often abused.
And when it came time to go into battles,
It was winner take all, of the goods and chattels.

Enter now Captain Horatio Wise.
He and his crew were after a prize.
They saw a French sloop in the Bay of Biscay.
And, although it seemed to be somewhat risky,
They fired their cannon from afar,
But unfortunately ran aground on a sand bar.
They had to await the next high tide,
Before they could sail again with rekindled pride.
Their “prize ship” of course, had sailed away.
Captain Wise could fight another day.

One year they were near the Barberry Coast,
When the Captain gave an unwise boast.
“If we don’t capture a prize ship this very day,”
“I’ll eat my hat and sail away.”
As twilight spread over the empty ocean,
The Captain had a realistic notion.
That he’d better look like he was eating his hat,
What he did look like was a dopey prat.
His crew who had felt the cato’nine tails lash,
Were up on deck, to see it, in a flash!