The unexpected death ☹☹☹

It was over few months ago when I got a text from my neighbor. It was “Hey Sis, there is bad news. Diana is no more, she met with an accident”. I couldn’t believe what my eyes just read. But I was so sure that this can’t come as joke, nobody is robust enough to make such jokes on anybody’s life. But a part of me was saying that this is not reality, she must not be in her senses.

What I just read was my friend, my childhood friend with whom I spent all my childhood memories, with whom I shared almost all my dirty secrets, with whom I shared my precious moments, with whom I lived my 25 years has gone. She was just 25 and how can someone just go like this leaving everyone crying after her. I was not in position to confirm about her death to anybody, I just didn’t want to listen it again. I was not strong to face the truth but I was left with no choice. I knew she was really gone. At that moment, I felt a pain that blasted through my body. Feeling as if my heart had been torn from my chest, I thought I would never stop crying.

I immediately got a call from another friend Max, we three used to live nearby and spent all our teenage together playing all stupid games. He explained me everything that it was an accident that killed my friend ☹ She was going to work place with her younger brother and there she met with an accident and she died on the spot. What the hell, she could have fought for her life, how can she be so week. ☹ I immediately thought about her parent, they must be going through toughest time of their life. Loss of a child at such early stage is something we can’t accept.

Most of us feel tremor and doubt when we hear about the unpredicted demise of a precious one. While all of us think about the subject of death from time to time, we are never prepared for its arrival. We always want that our family and friends will reach old age. Yet, it is not rare for death to come earlier, surprisingly, through accident or disease. The early disbelief and coldness we experience gives us time to focus our energies, and to prepare for the deep feelings which will follow.

When we understand that our important one is gone, the streams of numbness can be very intense. It is natural to find ourselves unable to sleep, crying at the drop of a hat, feeling angry or numb. We ask the question, “Why did this happen?” We search for the answer but we never get one. It can take a stretched time to get to a place of acceptance or reconstruct yourself of a “new normal being” to move forward in life and rebuild a workable version of one’s life. But it is difficult when the losses are rapid, totally unanticipated, or escorted by horror because they are pointless, the cognitive, emotional, psychological, and physical impact is profound.

Unexpected death brings the sense of guilt as well that we failed to communicate our feeling, the feeling of love, how important that person is for you, how much you love that person. We forget that a relationship is measured through its entire life and not just by its ending. We become so busy in our life that we almost forget those whom we love and realize it when we loss that person. So, don’t wait till tomorrow, spend time with your closed ones, express them your feeling. 😊