Consensus vs Compromise

As the hero of one famous movie said, "marriage is built on a compromise." But is this true? And is not that because the number of divorces is constantly growing, that the spouses are looking for a compromise and do not try to reach a consensus?

What is a compromise? A compromise is the resolution of some conflict situation through mutual concessions. What does this conflict resolution lead to? It leads to the fact that both sides are unsatisfied. The wife wants to go to the theater, and her husband - to football. They make a compromise decision and go to the cinema. But none of them wanted to go to the movies. They both remained unsatisfied and this did not improve their relationship.

When we make decision from consensus, we are looking for the real cause of each other's desires. After all, it may turn out that the husband did not want to see football as much as he wanted to rest in an informal atmosphere, and his wife did not so much want to go to the theater as she wanted to put on her new dress. Perfectly! They choose another place to rest and they both are satisfied.

Sometimes it's really better for a husband to go to football, and his wife - to a theater. Everyone will get what they want, and then they will be able to exchange impressions. This will also be a decision based on consensus.
Do not look for compromise, but reach a consensus. This will help to keep your relationship.