How To Accept That The Past Can't Be Changed

"Can't we just accept that the past is what it is?" This was my father's response to my request to change something in his life. As a child he had made a lot of changes and had thought very highly about them. He had tried to change the way he looked and the way he acted. He wanted to save his marriage but he had to learn to let go and to forgive so many hurts that had been caused by other people. There were times I agreed with him but more times than not I would remind him of all of the hurts he had caused me in the past.


Dad was a character who always thought deeply about things, often arguing about them until he had made his final decision. He was very willing to listen to me when I had to speak my mind but when it came to making changes in his life he would often get irritated. He was adamant that all changes should be for the better. I had to learn to accept that he was the master of his life and that I was only a slave to his decisions.

Dad lived a positive lifestyle. He did not worry about the cost of living or the cost of food. He enjoyed the simple pleasures of life and lived for the moment. That was Dad's peace of mind. It didn't matter if things went wrong or if he disappointed someone else, he took care of himself and focused on what could be done to improve his life.

The important thing to remember is that anyone can learn to be more accepting of the past. You are in charge of how you feel at any given time. Once you gain control over your thoughts and feelings you can use them to create positive changes in your life. You can learn how to have faith in yourself and be proactive in pursuing a positive outcome.

Here's an example. If you go to work complaining about how you are not appreciated at work, then don't expect to be appreciated at work any more. Your boss will begin to notice and mark you up on the "no appreciation" list each week until you start to accept yourself the way you are. When that happens you will begin to see things differently. It will be easier to get ahead in life because you will be more accepting of the past. You will no longer see things as being your fault or something that can't be changed.

If you want to change other people or things around you then you must first accept the responsibility. You must be willing to let them know that you are willing to make changes. The worst thing that can happen is that they will point out all of the reasons why you shouldn't and try to keep you stuck in your little rut. But by accepting the responsibility you are giving yourself the power to change and then actually doing it, you are showing your positive side and getting others to do the same.

If you are having problems with acceptance in your current situation then you are going to need to get to the top of your own problem. Once you are able to accept that there is a problem but you are going to take it one step at a time and work to fix it, you will find that the acceptance comes naturally. No matter what you are currently doing or where you are at in life, you will be able to change it once you start to accept that you have a problem.


The bottom line is that acceptance means that you are willing to work toward a positive outcome. Accept that the past has happened but you are going to use the present to create the future that you want. Once you can accept that the past can't be changed, then you are going to move forward with your life. You are going to look at the situations that you are in and decide if you want to go down that road or if you are going to continue forward on a positive note. Remember that you can't change the past but you can control how you react to the situations that you are in.