The lists of life and Steem

Today we tried a new yoghurt for our daughter, coconut, it doesn't seem to suit her and she has been randomly crying as she sleeps. We have to try these things because it is the only way to get an expanded range of foods. It us fucking tiresome after 3 years, but if it helps her one day eat relatively nornally, it is worth it.

I am by her bed now and it looks like I won't be going anywhere soon. Guess I will write and make some flag food. People can still read it.

Ever wonder if you are on some kind of list? I don't mean @themarkymark's blacklist, because if you are in there, you likeky deserve it, I mean some kind of ethereal list that dictates outcomes.

It is funny how many things are outside of our control yet affect our lives, things like our height or color.

"you are too short for me*

My daughter has food allergies that I am relatively sure she doesn't want. Regardless, she is going to have to deal with them.

"Don't blame me, I come from a long line of assholes..."

Unfortunately, I don't. I think my dad is a pretty good person, and while I never met him, I assume his dad wasn't all bad as he risked he and his family being beheaded during World War 2 if he had been discovered helping POWs escaped from concentration camps, escape Malaysia. There is self-preservation, and there is the right thing to do.

I hope I never have to face war.

"FLAG WARS" don't count. As annoying as it is to have some douche flag posts, there is a bigger picture to Steem future, and I am playing long. Just like the painstakingly long process to get my daughter's health in check, Steem is a slow process that could eventually lead to a great deal of change in many ways online and in personal lives.

@smooth flagged me last night too. It was a bit of a surprise tbh as it was the first flag from him I think since he and @abit clipped my first ever large vote on Steem during the whale experiment almost 3 years ago. They were the first DVs I ever got and I remember the confusion I felt as I had no idea of why as I had no knowledge of the whale experiment.

I remember the night even. I had been on Steem for a couple months trying to build something to help my family finances as our daughter required formula that was costing near 700€ a month, almost twice our mortgage at the time. On top of that, it was 400€ a month in specialists andmedocation, and my wife was still recovering 8 months after a botched delivery.

With our daughter not sleeping due to stomach pains, I would spend the nights up walking her around the streets, and when she was sleeping and I could sneak her in to the home, I would sit and write until about 4 am,tebding to her a very 45minutes or so. At 7, it was time to get up and run my business.

On the early morning hours, I saw a post of mine jump to about 30 dollars, which for me was about 29 dollars more than my average. @thejohalfiles had voted upon it and while in reality it would change nothing for my life finances, it felt like the months of grind were paying off.

I heard my wife stirring in the bed and actually went and told her about it, even though all she really understood was that I was writing and trying to earn something. She was in too much pain to really care what I was doing at night, I think she was just glad I was trying to do something.

she smiled and said, perhaps one day it will help.

I returned to the screen feeling pretty good, and about ten minutes later, the value dropped tö about 10 dollars as the flags arrived. I was pretty crushed and then dropped a comment asking what it was all about. I don't remember who, but someone pointed me to the whale experiment post by @smooth and after reading, I understood enough (I didn't know anything about steem or curves at that time) that I agreed with the flags, and was happy to be part of the experiment, even if I didn't have a choice.

I didn't tell my wife because the next day even though she knew 30 dollars or 1000 dollars wouldn't be much help, she still seemed to be a bit more positive about the day.

maybe she thought we'd turned a slight corner and got off the shit list of life.

Still to this day I haven't used any Steem for anything, though I have given a fair bit to people to live over the years. I can manage with my work and work ethic, not all can and it isn't always up to them. Though as I said in my last post, need trumps preference. If you aren't willing to help yourself every way you can while in need because you'd rather feed your preferences, my patience to help isn't very long.

These days, I don't emotionally react to downvotes, even if there is no good reason for them like what is happening now. The surprise at @smooth DVing was that it seemed out of the blue, but it immediately reminded me of that night 2.5 years ago. I am actually pretty grateful for those flags because they caused me to actually start learning about steem for the first time as more than a social media platform with earning potential.

There is so much more than that here, so much more value than the inflation pool, it just takes time. Just like the food allergies my daughter suffers from, eventually most of the illness that plagues Steem will be painstakingly dealt with and a lot of great things can happen.

Hopefully then, Steem will be on the "place to be" list and have a community that gives enough of a fuck, and a strong enough economy to back it up and stay there.

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]