Letting go.

My closet has been a big thorn in my side since we moved into this house several years ago. I was about to give birth and unable to do much physically, and my mother-in-law ended up unpacking all my clothes and putting them in my closet. So, I never really got to go through that purge thing that usually happens when you move houses. Since then, I’ve had a hard time finding any time to organize my things and go through old clothes and all of that. I’ve decided I’m just sick of having a huge closet full of clothes I don’t wear, though, so I’m making the time.

It’s actually proven to be a lot harder than I thought it would be. First of all, I’m a disorganized slob, and I hang onto stuff way longer than is necessary. I’m never sure what to do with old debit card receipts and stuff like that, so I had three or four old purses - uh, full of old receipts. That was weird going through stuff from several years ago, when I was leading a completely different life. And I had an entire rack of work clothes that I haven’t worn in a good ten years, and it was weird packing it all up into bags. I kept thinking, “Why on earth did I wear this?” Let me tell ya - it’s becoming really clear to me that my self worth and confidence was at an all time low during my first marriage. I wore the ugliest, most matronly clothes I could find, apparently. And, holy hell, would it have been SO hard for someone to write me an anonymous letter begging me to stop wearing overall shorts? I packed up a dozen pair of overalls and overall shorts before I stopped counting them. Also, my love affair with oversized denim shirts? Scary.

In fact, I had a hell of a lot of oversized…EVERYTHING! I’ve been more or less the same size since my early twenties, so I can’t figure out why I was wearing SIZE 28 tops. I also threw away probably ten ankle-length skirts and dresses. Ugly, ugly, ugly clothes. I’m embarrassed seeing them in the pile on the floor!

I’m hoping once I get my closet all cleared of everything from my twenties and from my first marriage, I’ll be able to spend more time in there and keep on top of organization.

P.S. I haven’t even begun to go through my shoes yet, but again - somebody could have staged an intervention about the time I bought my fifth pair of Doc Marten boots. I’m just sayin’.