$h*t Happens!

So as i sit here... in freezing temperatures with my fireplace going and two dogs the size of horses ( one Great Dane crossbreed called Revo and a Boerboel named Roxy ) peacefully sleeping in front of the comforting heat of the flames , I had this idea.

As a young South African dude (22) I have had quite the crazy life so far. Crazy enough for me to think these stories should 100% be worth sharing because despite the fact that none of them have really been the smartest things ive done , these are absolute core memories guaranteed to atleast get a chuckle out of you.

Every family should have ( what I believe ) a regular holiday destination. The place that was the number one getaway for long weekends and shorter holidays. a Place that was not too far from home but entertaining enough for the kids to have countless hours of fun while the parents could still switch off and go into holiday mode ( just a nice way of saying day drinking for the adults ) we all know thats all a holiday actually is ; )

For us that place was ( and still is ) Badplaas. a Forever resort in Mpumalanga South Africa , filled with swimming pools,slides,rides and entertainment for the whole family. Me and my younger brother (Dylan) were 11 and 10 at the time and after a long day of swimming,sliding and getting sunburnt I remember our parents giving us strict instructions to go shower and get dressed in warm clothes before we had dinner. We were camping, so the only bathroom facilities we had access to in the resort were the public ablution blocks , where there were cubicles with either a bathtub and toilette or just a shower inside.

These cubicles had walls that were about 2m high and were left open at the top. So as me and Dylan walked into the block I see an open cubicle right by the entrance. This cubicle had only a bathtub and toilette, right there and then I urgently needed that toilette... So immediately i tell Dylan " lets take this one " and he says " but theres only one bathtub". So i convince him that he could run a bath while i use the toilette and then i will take a bath after him. He agreed...

So while im on the toilette ( taking care of business ) we are having a big conversation as Dylan is running a bath, until we got interrupted. An ice cold mountain of water came crashing over the top of the wall, all over me while I'm fully dressed still sitting on my throne. Dylan laughing his a$$ off at me while I on the other hand was FURIOUS! Seconds later the cubicle next door opens and shortly after we hear the shower open. I Tell Dylan to close the tap and pick up our bags ( because we need to get ready to run!)

I Had an idea !! Seeing a plastic container on the side of the bathtub with a bar of soap inside , gave me the fabulous idea to get back at this a$$h*le. Taking out the bar of soap and very carefully using the container to scoop out my turd from the toilette ( I know , sounds disgusting right ) . I Cautiously climbed onto the reservoir on the back of the toilette so that i can have the height to look over to the next door cubicle. Without any hesitation I threw it ( the turd ) at that person with every ounce of power in my arm.

Me and Dylan ran out of those blocks faster than this person could realize what hit him, only to hear a full grown man yell like a little girl just as we got outside. Sprinting our way back to the camp site ( which was not very far ) we could not wait to tell our Dad what happened. On the arrival still giggling about what happened , our Dad and Grandpa were standing at the fire and Dad almost immediately asked us ( what did you two get up to now ). Out of breath from sprinting and still a bit of giggling we instantly spill the beans...

Not really knowing if Dad was ready to give us the hiding of our lives or going to laugh. Nevertheless , he wasn't the one reacting weird. My Grandpa standing next to him looked like he had just seen the Lochness monster , with eyes the size of golf balls...

He looked at my Dad and said " I was the one that threw the kids with water "

Luckily for us , this never ended up getting us in trouble. Our parents had a much bigger laugh than we expected and for the rest of that holiday Dylan and myself just prayed that the person from the shower never saw or recognized us...