Turn Your Scars Into Stars

''The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it.''

When I first started my wordpress a couple of years ago, one of the first posts I published was named ''Turn your scars into stars''.
I loved the name so much that I secretly told myself that this is how I would name the first book I'd publish one day.
While I do not consider myself any close from being ready to write one, hopefully in a couple of decades, I will.😉

I am proud of my scars, as I think they have a story to tell.
They also serve as a reminder that I am stronger than I ever thought I could be.
I love to make the analogy of scars compared with the moon.
A moon is full of craters and holes, yet it has always been associated as a symbol of beauty.
This is why I believe that our scars are beautiful in their own way.

''Becoming friends with your mind''

What a beautiful goal we should strive to aim for.
The tricky part that comes with having a human mind, is that it does not come with an instruction book.
We do not have the choice, but to tell ourselves stories in order to live, and in order to create meaning for the world around us.
Unfortunately, telling ourselves stories is not the safest foundation to stand on, as many of them appear to be false.

On a different note, recently, I've read a book which is called ''Dodging energy vampires: an empath's guide to evading relationships that drain you and restoring your health and power'' by Christiane Northrup, M.D.
Here's an interesting passage that illustrates the power of core beliefs:

''The wounds you experience in childhood shape your entire life - most of the time without you realizing it. They form the belief system from which you operate, and the vast majority of these beliefs are not even conscious. About 90% of them - and the subsequent behaviors that come from them - are programmed into us before the age of seven. These all operate below the radar, influencing our biology and circumstances automatically.''

It's fascinating enough to take into account that most of these beliefs that stem from our childhood, create our internal monologue, that little radio inside our mind that never stops analysing everything that goes on.
Our brain is so powerful in all its different layers, that it can make us connect instantly to our memories as well as our unconscious mental patterns.
Our unconscious mind is so much more powerful than our conscious mind.
It is always in advance of our conscious mind.
It is not for nothing that we call it the storage library, as it literally stores every experience that has happened to us in our life.

''Transforming trauma into story'' is another important part of healing from tragedy.
I believe that each one of us will experience tragedy at least once in our lifetime.
As much as some traumatic experiences can cause a suffering so profound that words can't be strong enough to explain, trauma can also serve as a powerful transformation for growth and development.

I believe in not being affraid of speaking out and sharing our story.
That is one lesson I would have told to my younger self.
You never know how many people your story will be able to help, even save, one day.

One of the twelve steps of AA goes like this:

''Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves''

I believe that human suffering is one of the most efficient ways to create change within ourselves.
Nevertheless, it does not mean that the more we suffer, the more we change.
Finding growth through pain is a deliberate choice, meaning that we have to actively want to heal ourselves, and use the pain to grow out of it.
Not every one necessarily chooses to do so.
I have someone in my life who experienced a lot of suffering during his lifetime, but always kept everything within.
He would never write, cry or talk about what he would feel while going through some difficult life trials.
It is extremely unfortunate as it led this person to express uncontrollable anger.
However, anger is most of the time a secondary emotion.
People who operate like this end up filling their inner self with so much toxicity, that they end up becoming poisonous human beings.
It breaks my heart, but in the end, it all comes down to choice.

In Chip Conley's book called ''Emotional equations - simple truths for creating happiness+sucess'' ,
he mentions something which I found interesting:

''Years ago, a wise therapist told me that she defined dysfunction as the distance between your public image and your private reality.''

Gentle reminder 💓

I would like to know what is your biggest lesson that life has taught you?
On this note, I hope that each one of you feels rejuvenated and ready for the new week!
Love you all, happy monday! 🌠 💗