Stupid Questions People Ask In Obvious Situations

If you ever heard your teacher say in school that there was no such thing as a stupid question, and you actually believed it, you are in for a big surprise today. I hate to break it to you, but there are indeed stupid questions.

See, the human mind is a curious thing. It constantly wants to know what it doesn’t know and therefore it does that by uttering out a question in hopes that someone else might satisfy its curiosity.

That is all fine and dandy but do you know where the problem begins? When people begin asking questions in the most obvious situations, the answers to which they already know but still want to show their dumber sides to the world by asking anyways.

We have all faced them and I personally have found that the best way to deal with such questions is to be sarcastic. I mean Dr. House level sarcastic. Nothing less will do! Let me give you some examples of these and you’ll understand what I’m saying.

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Q: (After an accident) Are You Okay?

Well, I don’t know what to say John. My left leg is swollen, my right arm is bleeding and my face is all bruised up. So, yes, I think am quite okay. As a matter of fact, I am so okay, that I will walk the entire way to the hospital!!

Q: (At the movies) Hey, what are you doing here?

I am here to buy some groceries. Yeah, I was running low on milk, eggs, some vegetables, and yeah, I also needed to buy a lot of beverages for this party I’m hosting tonight. What about you guys? Why are you here?

Q: (Climbing the stairs with something heavy, clearly struggling) Do You Need Help?

Nah!!! I am doing just fine. Oh, all this sweat and fast breathing? That’s just me pretending to be tired. Let me pretend some more talking to you here for 5 minutes with this incredibly ‘light’ thing in my hand.

Q: (Knocks on the bathroom door while I’m taking shower) Are You In There?

No, I’m at Pizza Hut ordering some pizzas. Do you want some? Oh wait, the waiter says there is none for people asking stupid questions. Sorry mate. Don’t blame me, blame the waiter!

Q: (Friend knocks on the bathroom door) What Are You Doing?

I’m in a meeting with the president. Don’t you have any manners. Go away. Sorry about that Mr. President. Won’t happen again. So, we were talking about China?

Q: (Call at 3 a.m.) Hey, Were You Sleeping? Did I Wake You Up?

No, man, don’t worry about it! I’m a vampire. I don’t need sleep. You have watched the Twilight movies right? Yeah, it’s just like that. Actually I was coming over there to watch you sleep. Oops, did I reveal too much? (Hangs up)

Q: (At the bus stop) Are You Waiting For The Bus?

No, I have some alien friends that are going to pick me up on their flying saucers from this location. The bus is too mainstream for me, you know. Fossil fuels and all that. Oh here they come!! (pretends to see a flying saucer land)

Q: (Earphones in the ear) Are You Listening To Music?

No, as a matter of fact, I’m receiving instructions from the FBI. I’m on a secret mission and I’m undercover. Shhh. If I tell you too much, I might just have to kill you!

Q: (At the mall, after shopping) Would You Like A Carry Bag, Sir?

Wait. Let me see if I can fit these clothes inside my pockets and these shoes in my back pocket. Oh no, unfortunately they don’t fit, so yes, I would like a carry bag, please!