Virtual Reality adventures and entering the Second Circle of Hell

Let me preface this first by saying that Virtual Reality is the frontier of an amazing technology that allows us to visit worlds created out of pure imagination where we can interact with each other, use tools for teaching, create works of art, and even help people who are going through PTSD, bed-ridden in a hospital, or need to emphasize with other people's realities.

My first VR experience

I picked up a simple Samsung VR gear headset since my phone is very good and I was surprised right away by how "in the virtual world" I was. I first loaded up Groove VR and was dazzled by a Buddha Statue with glowing eyes and a giant whale that was swimming around me. I watched one of my videos on my phone and I chose to see it in a movie theater. I was LAUGHING when I saw the chairs right next to me. It was like I was there. They actually did it, Virtual reality is a REALITY!

Then I thought to myself. Now to try out why I really bought VR for. The fucking three-hundred and sixty degrees of porn experience. Now let me say this. This isn't just an ordinary experience for me. Because I have a sexual fetish, a fetish that is impossible to experience in reality. Basically, the perspective that VR360 gives me, makes it so I can actually live out this fantasy for realsies. Right there, for me, is a realization that this shit is going to get wild. Because if I have that, if I can live out my sexual fantasy, will that mean I am going to be a slave to my desires and never seek an experience that is real and perhaps more exciting than my fantasies?

I load up the Youtube and there are a myriad of videos that include my fetish already lined up to me. I load it up and I am fucking blown away. This shit is finally real! Oh my fucking GOD! I am IN THIS WORLD! AHAHA! It is quite incredible, and awe-inspiring moment for me because throughout my entire life with this fetish I always wanted it to be real and sometimes I even thought I would easily give away my eternal SOUL for me to just experience a moment of that joy.

Now I don't think to "Love Thyself" is bad or evil or wrong! That is like saying weed or chocolate is wrong. BUT, I have noticed, through my experiences, that in excess this shit is very undesirable. Because I will start craving it more and more. I will notice that any girl that walks by, in real life, will distract me and I'll think "I need to fight the one-eyed dragon right now". And I will keep thinking about that until I get home and go downtown Mr. Brown and relieve my temporal suffering.

So I've limited it, I only do it when I am distracted by it and not just because it is fun. Then I notice that sex never distracts me. Eventually, it would be nice if I didn't have the need to do it at all, that may or may not happen.

As well, when I do hand-to-gland combat, I will also do a sort psuedo-tantric method of not ejaculating. This actually makes the experience way better, and also I do not lose any of my precious bodily fluids. Right now I have a sorta belief structure that says if I ejaculate, I am losing something. Perhaps it is as simple as just a bit of energy or maybe it is a fragment of my infinite potential that is being ejected from the warm embrace of the All-God into the dark cold abyss where it will never return. Either way it upsets me.

When I use VR, I just cannot hold back my orgasm. I start jacking off and then I don't even have to close my eyes because I'm there, nothing to imagine. The life essence just drains out of me. It doesn't even feel great in the end. But getting there is definitely way more fun! I feel there is a trap here. I feel there is like some succubus that has got me by the mushroom tip and is teasing me into my base desires that limit my potential as a human being. These are merely beliefs! Stories within my mind! But, my dreams, my recent divination with the Devil card in the present is a constant reminder of a vice that is going to get out of hand.

Of course the two lovers are chained and have a sort of limited scope of true love, you can tell they have the type of love that says "Meh good enough". The chains on them are loosely fitted and can easily come off. The devil is a great teacher and a reminder that I always have the choice to give in and be cool with experiencing virtual reality or go higher.

Anyways, I just got out of cyberspace and I ejaculated all over the floor. I feel like I am regressing back to the days when I was doing nothing in life but smoking weed, playing video games, and masturbating everyday. I just deleted all my videos and saved them to an external hard drive because, of course, I know I may want them back. I put the goggles in my closest and locked it away for awhle.

This post may seem a bit dramatic, like I am blowing this a little bit out of proportion. But, trust me when I say this. The nightmares I get after I abuse my divine staff by casting more magical pleasure spells than I have the mana for, are never fun to experience.