Parents-in-law.... Guidence needed
Ok, so my wife and I have been together for about 7 years and been married for 2 years.
From the beginning her mother never really liked me but it seemed the father was ok with me.
So being the kind of person that I am, I just never really gave a shit.
After a few months, they came to me and apologised for their behaviour. But something kept telling me that I should be weary. So, all went ok for the next few years. There have been ups and downs. But nothing that I couldn't handle.
I decided to ask them if I can marry their daughter and they were very happy and blessed us. But I should have knonw they were not happy with the idea.
I set a special date and went on one knee and was as nervous as hell.
We got married, everybody enjoyed them selfs at the wedding except my new parents in law... they were as sour as a proon.
Then just the other day I hear that after we got engaged, her parents asked some people to pray that the relationship doesn't work out.
I am kind of hurt to hear such a thing, and I'm not sure how to handle this situation in a fashionable way.
If it was totally up to me, well I would tell them to go f.... them selfs. With the way they treated me in the beginning, I can believe such a story.
So what do I do...
I did tell my wife about it, and she confronted them. And the deny everything. We can't exactly tell them who told us due to some personal reasons of theirs.
I know that they are lying, but they don't know that I know that they are trying to cover up.
So, how do I handle this?
I would personally just ignore them over this issue. If you kick off at them you risk alienating your wife. She obviously has many more years of history with them than you do. However wrong they may be, they are still her parents with whom she has a strong bond. Anything that comes in between that bond (ie you!) will be looked upon as a threat. Even unconsciously she may resent you for it.
Her parents are the ones with the problem, not you and your wife. Try to rise above their behaviour and be thankful for the love you and your wife share. It will not be easy but you will both save yourselves a ton of stress and potentially years of conflict. Good luck to you both.
I do understand what you are saying. My wife never really had that mother daughter relationship. she has more of that with my mother than with her own.
I will never come between my wife and her parents but the thing that have been said about my family and myself were unnecessary. They dont even make time to get to know my parents.
But you are right, I just need to get over their bad intentions and show them that I am the better person.
I do believe in that wheel that turns.
Thank you for the advice
You're welcome. It is easy to give out advice when not going through the situation yourself but I hope it helped a little. I hope everything works out for you :-)