Everyone likes a good story, but a good story can lead to love?

Storytelling is a fundamental form of communication and research shows the power of narrative power to change ideas and influence behavior.

For example, personal narratives are often used in advertising and health activities and lead to an increase in cancer screening. Even fiction led to social change; the fictitious "jungle" of Upton Sinclair led to reforms in the meat packaging industry.

But as psychologists and experts who persuade narratives, we want to know: How does the story affect the romantic relationship?

I conducted three studies to determine if the ability to tell a story is conducive to attracting romantic partners in the short and long term.

I find it important to tell a good story - especially for one gender.

Command crowd

In the first of three studies, undergraduates were asked to evaluate a potential romantic partner by looking at a photo of the opposite sex. They also receive information about their personal storytelling skills, along with brief, neutral biographical information such as the person's hometown and the fact that he or she likes pasta.

There are four groups of participants in the study. Participants were told that the person in the picture is a good storyteller, a Chinese-speaking storyteller, or a storyteller. (Those in control do not get the information about storytelling ability.)

For example, under "good stories," participants read "This person often makes good stories at parties, in part because of the variety of interesting words to choose from."

After reading these descriptions, participants assessed the person's physical attractiveness and the person's attractiveness for a date, long-term relationship and as a friend.

It is somewhat surprising that the results of the first study show that storytelling techniques do not lead to an overall increase in attractiveness.

Instead, we found that effective storytellers seem to have an advantage in attracting long-term partners. In contrast, a woman described as telling a story is not preferred by men, while men who tell a good story do not like short-term relationships.

In the second study, participants were provided with an actual story purportedly described by potential partners. Half of the participants read valid stories and the other half received invalid stories. We use a one-page humorous tale of a father writing games on the seesaw of his two sons, written in informal conversational style. Compared to good stories, this poor story uses a lack of imagination, using irrelevant details and refilling questions such as "Oh, wait a minute, how did it happen? Yes, I suppose yes."

The same result has emerged: women as good male storytellers are more attractive than longtime companion storytellers, and stories told by female storytellers have nothing to do with men.

We wanted to better understand why there was gender disparity, so we conducted a third study similar to the first study, but also included issues related to social status.

Included items: "To what extent do you think this person will be welcomed, admired, become a good leader and become a source of inspiration for others to go beyond?"

Similarly, when it comes to a potential long-term dating partner, women find that good storytellers are more attractive than storytellers. The ability to tell stories has no effect on male participants. Importantly, women think men are good storytellers: more likely to be leaders or admired.

Evolutionary explanation

The gender differences in these findings can be explained by the evolutionary approach to understanding the choice of partner.

The theory in this field emphasizes the different evolutionary concerns of men and women in delivering genes. Theory suggests that men tend to "invest extensively" in reproduction, while women "invest wisely".

Specifically, when it comes to having children, men can provide even less single parental investment (even as a single sexual contact), while women's investments include months of pregnancy and possible infant care.

According to this perspective, men may spend more energy than women on short-term mating or relationships, focusing on fertility clues such as age and physical attractiveness. At the same time, women try to find out who they can provide resources for any future generations.

Given that women are likely to value the value of "good daddy" or provider more in long-term relationships, our findings suggest that male storytelling skills may imply resourcefulness for women - especially if good storytellers get higher Social status.

Researchers have not yet tested whether good storytellers are really able to gain higher social status or leadership. At least as far as our third study seems to be based, it seems that there is a tendency that people who can direct their populations with compelling stories are more likely to gain higher status in the group.

Evolutionary theorists also try to explain the function of storytelling in social groups and how it relates to their status.
For example, according to the "story as an instrumental hypothesis" in ancient societies, those who are best able to explain (what they consider to be) supernatural phenomena may have risen to power.

Another theory holds that human beings have significant survival benefits through the ability to think flexibly, and storytelling is a form of cognitive games that fosters thinking in this way.

Finally, the story is important: not just for fun, not just to understand the world, but to build relationships. Mutual physical hissing may be everything needed for a successful first date.

But for long-term relationships, people often look for more. And for some people, engaging talk for hours or stressful story of living somebody's past may lead to love.