Some Thimgs About Newborns From 3 Moths Experienced Father

in zzan3 years ago (edited)

I'm 32 years old and 3 months ago I became a father, for the first time, I had a son. We planned this baby, and of course, we fantasized about what it would be like to have a baby. Stories from other parents, images from films and books, one way or another, form in the head a certain picture of a bright future. As it turned out, movies show only 1% of reality, and the memory of friends, who have children, surprisingly erases the data…

Maybe, many parents don't tell some things because they are afraid of being judged by others. But when they talk to the same parents, and you remind them of what a newborn is, they begin to share their experiences, which are actually very similar to mine.

According to the stories of many parents (and from my personal experience with my son), there is a huge difference between newborn boys and girls. Boys have a certain "lag" in the development of the gastrointestinal tract system… So, here are a few things about newborns that you will not find in glossy magazines, and that have been erased from the memory of your parents:

  • Newborn boys fart all the time, it interferes with eating and sleeping. The more he farts, the less he sleeps, the less he sleeps, the more he tries to eat, and he farts again.

  • It is true that newborns sleep for 14-16 hours a day, but they don't sleep for more than 1.5-2 hours in a row. Because they fart and want to eat.

  • In the first 2 months, you'll have enough free time to do... nothing. Every time you start to eat, wash, or sit on the toilet, he'll wake up.

  • Until 2 moths his crying is absolutely monotonous, in any situation. You'll not be able to understand what he wants, eat, sleep, hug, or buy some bitcoins.

  • First 3-4 weeks you'll not be able to endure his cry. This is the worst and most irritating thing you've ever heard. You'll feel physical pain in your ears. Designed by evolution. Your task is to eliminate the irritant, without harming.

  • You'll get super hearing. Before my son was born, the minimum volume on my TV was 6, now 2 is sometimes too loud. The street will turn into a very loud place for you.

  • You’ll buy any item that has the line "helps your child sleep" in the description. Automatic swing, orthopedic cocoon for sleeping, scented candles, 20 different pacifiers. You can just burn this money.

  • What works today will definitely not work tomorrow. Almost everything only works once. Yesterday you sang, today you dance, a week later you put on a puppet show.

  • No parent knows how to properly dress their child for a walk. At +15 degrees, you will meet other children in a winter jacket, or a T-shirt, or naked. If you made a mistake with clothes, then there will be no calm walk.

  • He makes scary sounds when he sleeps. The first weeks you will wake up with fear that he is suffocating. Or that you got a pug instead of a child.

  • It is unlikely that you will love other children more, rather the opposite. Because they interfere with your baby's sleep.

  • You have a great weather sensor now. About 12 hours before rain, pressure change, hurricane or heat wave, he begins to fart 10 times more. His stomach reacts even to the flapping of the wings of a butterfly 10,000 km away.

  • If, before your baby was born, you were given a test-drive for a month with another baby, you would never have dared to have your own baby.

  • Now you have a lot of new fears, they all stem from one thing - you are afraid that something will happen with your child.

  • You will want to change this world for the better in order to express your gratitude to the wife who gave birth to your son. And so that your child grows up in a better future. But you don't have time for that yet.

Despite all of the above, you will love your child more and more every day, every hour, every moment. I don't understand how it works, and don't want to know. I want my son to be happy, like all daughters and sons, all mothers and fathers.

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