Potty Training sucks! – in a nutshell

I officially hate potty training!!! I just don’t get it and I don’t think my daughter is getting it either. Either that or she just really wants to witness first hand the phenomenon of spontaneous combustion when I explode from frustration. Or maybe she wants to see how red mommy’s face can get before it sets on fire, and since I’m a redhead, it can reach pretty high levels of redness.

             

Today I decided to take the advice of “potty training specialists” and put my daughter in big girl underwear to wear around the house. They say that by doing that the child will get the sensation of being wet, which they won’t like, and it will encourage them to want to use the potty. True? NO! I sat my daughter on the potty after lunch, and she successfully made a pee. Yay! Bladder empty, should be good for awhile. Think again! She was walking around the house pushing her dolly stroller when she peed herself. Do you think she tells me? No. She continues to walk around trailing pee around with her and the stroller. It’s like she’s making a Picasso piss drawing on my floors. Okay, first accident, no problem.

                  

I go back into the kitchen to continue unloading the dishwasher. I suddenly get the feeling that something isn’t right. Maybe it’s because there was silence, and we all know that that is bad news. I pop my head out into the living room, and there is my daughter rubbing her feet around in a circular motion on the floor. What is beneath her feet? Pee of course! It’s like she’s stirring around a big stew of piss on my floor, along with one of her board books, which is now garbage. Great! On to round 3!

After the second incident, I told her to sit on the potty, to try and reinforce the idea that she is supposed to pee in the potty and not on the floor. I go back to unloading the dishwasher. My daughter is sitting on the potty, but keeps getting up and telling me “pee pee.” Every time I go and check, no pee in the potty. She comes to tell me again, so I go and check, and then I step in more pee on the floor. This is awesome!!!!! Now, not only do I have to clean up more pee, now I’ve got my slippers soaked in pee as well. Is there a category for this in the Guiness Book of World Records because I think we are getting close to qualifying.

                     

Now keep in mind that all of this has happened in a span of 30 minutes. How many times can one little person pee? And why doesn’t she just pee it all out at once? I am ready to pull my hair out and poke my eyeballs out at this time, so I look at the clock, and thank god it’s nap time!!!!

I put her down for her nap, and I am just so frustrated at this point. My dog has some sort of weird sixth sense, and she senses when people are angry or frustrated. I haven’t yelled or screamed or let out my frustrations at all at this point because I am trying to keep calm, so not to deter my daughter from potty training. After I put my daughter down for her nap, my dog is following me around the house frantically because she can tell I am angry. I’m trying to do chores and here is my dog stuck to my leg as if we are competing in a 3-legged race.

                                        

Well, I’m going to take some good old advice – serenity now, serenity now…..